I just thought maybe he might like me.
But I was wrong.
I’m in B24, waiting for Daisy at lunchtime.
Rereading the first line ofThe Color Purple:
“You better not never tell nobody but God.”
We’re studying the book for English.
I’ve watched the movie seven times
but I never get past the first line when
I open the book.
Kieran knocks at the door, even though
it’s open. I feel that fight-or-flight feeling.
He walks in toward me
and my heart is racing.
“I saw you drop this,” says Kieran,
placing my letter to Rowan in the open
palms of the book’s pages.
“And I didn’t think you’d want
anyone to read it.”
He pauses. “I read it, though—
it’s really sweet.”
I’m embarrassed and confused
and still a bit afraid.
“Are you okay?” asks Kieran.
“Yes, I’m gay,” I say, ready for him to hit me.
He laughs. “No, idiot, I said are youokay?”
“Oh. Yeah. I think so. No,” I say.
Don’t cry, Michael. Please don’t cry,
I say to myself, but it’s too late.
I don’t know why he’s being so nice.
He puts his arm around me and says,