Page 35 of Bullets and Blood
“I should be fine.”Nix shut the car door, but he didn’t rush up to the open door of the shop and café.He held out his hand and waited for Lance to take it.“Happy couple, right?”
The way Nix looked at him, it was easy to believe the lie and forget that Nix was only with him because of the truce.He was useful to Nix, a convenient fuck and little more.He took Nix’s hand.Still better than being an accessory to murder.That’s what he’d be if he followed orders.
He didn’t have the spine of steel that Nix had or the walls to keep people out.But he’d learned that beneath the prickles and armor Nix wore, he was a wounded creature.He should be telling his aunt that.Nix Hadley wasn’t an ice-cold killer; he was a broken man who’d done as he was expected even though it destroyed him death by death.
Lance walked with Nix to the door, knowing that while he couldn’t make a plan where they got to live and be together, he could make one where they both got to live.
Maybe.
He’d never be blooded.But for the first time in his life, he wasn’t sure that’s what he wanted.That was why he couldn’t answer when Nix had asked.If he wasn’t blooded, what he had with Nix wouldn’t last—he wasn’t that much of an optimist.
Nix greeted the real estate agent with all the charm Lance had come to expect from him.The man glanced at the two of them as Nix rattled off the lie about family money and starting a place of their own.He gave Lance’s hand a squeeze and gave him an adoring glance, and even Lance believed the damn lie.
The real estate agent clearly did.Because he was thoroughly ensorcelled or because he wanted to offload the dump?
They wandered through the building, what had been the cellar door.There was a small café with an industrial kitchen, fittings still in place.Nix asked all the right questions about permits and the structure as if he knew about running a winery.Then he started asking about what kinds of grapes had been planted and if the vines had been tended or left.
And Lance realized this was what Nix had been preparing for, what his family had offered him as youngest son before the broken peace talks and the murder of his older brothers.Nix knew this stuff because it was what he was interested in.This was where his heart lay.
Lance wanted nothing more than to write a check and buy the place for him.
They left the business premises and looked over the house.It wasn’t a total dump.It needed a clean-up, some repairs, and a repaint.Nothing he couldn’t do with the right tools and time.
Nix put his hands on the railing and stared out at the vines that stretched as far as he could see.Nix nudged him.“See the top of the hill?That’s the property line.”
“There’s also another area three kilometers down the road.Also being leased,” the estate agent said.
“If I bought it, when would I get the use of my grapes back?”
“After the next harvest.”
Nix nodded.“Can I go down to the field?”
“Go for it.Have a wander and a chat.I’ll wait here.”The real estate agent went into the kitchen.
Nix was already heading down the steps and out into the field as if it were already his.
Lance jogged to catch up.“What do you think?”
Nix spun in a circle, eyes up to the sky and mouth pulled into a perfect sad smile.“That it’s everything.”He lowered his hands.“And totally out of reach.Even if I crawled over broken glass for a year, I’d never have it.Do you know what that’s like to want something so bad…” He winced and clamped his jaw shut.“Of course you do.I would turn you if I could, trade my blood for this place in a heartbeat.”
It wasn’t being blooded Lance was thinking about.It was Nix.He’d never really have him.There’d always be bad blood between them because of who they’d been born.
“I didn’t mean for this to hurt.”
“I like the pain.I want to turn the knife.Just so I know I’m alive and have more than surviving to live for.I want you to add it all to your dossier when this is done.Someone should know the truth.”Nix drifted between the rows of vines.
My family doesn’t care about the truth.
They cared about power and control.“I still don’t understand why my aunt?—”
Nix put his fingers on Lance’s lips.“And the odds are you’ll never know.Unless you are face-to-face.And even then, you won’t live to share the answer.”He pulled his finger away.“Happy couple.”That forced smile again.“God, I want this to be real.”
Lance was sure his heart fractured at Nix’s pain, but he didn’t know how to say he wanted that too.Nix’s plans didn’t include him.All he wanted was the winery.He swallowed down the hurt.“What are we going to tell him?”
“Oh, we don’t want to be too keen.There are other places we’re looking at.”
“We are?”
