Page 65 of Spark

“Obviously not. Kendrick, Ruby likes bad boys she has to chase—a guy who needs fixing and taming. Not a golden retriever on a fucking leash!”

I scowl. “I’m not a golden retriever, and I’m not on a leash.”

Savage snorts. “Yes, you are. To both. For Ruby you are, anyway. Now, don’t get me wrong, that girl adores that about you. But it’s what makes you herbestie. If you want her to actually want tofuckyou, though, then you’re going to have to be a Doberman—the same way you are with all the other women you actually fuck. You have to think of Ruby as a tour fling and treat her accordingly.”

“I can’t do that. I don’t even know what that means.”

“Yes, you do. You treat tour flings like you don’t give a shit about them. At least, compared to the way you treat Ruby.”

I scoff. “I love Ruby, Savage. I treat other people differently because I don’t love them. Because I can’t love anybody but her. You think I haven’t tried? I have! To death. But it’s notpossible, because nobody I’ve ever been with has even come close to making me feel the way Ruby does.”

He looks at me sympathetically. “I get it. I really do, man. But that’s all the more reason you need to stick with the plan and make her chase you, not the other way around. Fuck flowers. Fuck stocking the fridge.Seducethe girl.”

“Giving her flowers and all that was only the first items on my list. You cut me off before I got to the good stuff. Trust me, on day one, I was killing the Doberman game. I was smashing it.”

Savage crosses his arms. “Okay, tell me every Doberman-like thing you did.”

“Okay, so for context?—"

“I don’t want context! I want bullet points. Seduction is war, remember? Tell me what weapons you’ve brought into battle.”

“Would you let me talk, for fuck’s sake? Jesus.” I gather myself. “You know my lyrics journal? Ruby saw it on my hotel bed in Vancouver, right after my birthday party, and she briefly glimpsed this long, crazy-ass song I’d written about her.”

“Shit. A love song?”

“Basically, yeah. Thank god, I snatched the book away before she read anything but the title.” I smirk. “Which she misread, by the way, thanks to my handwriting.” I snicker. “She thinks I wrote a song called ‘Spank,’ when actually it was called ‘Spark.’”

We both burst out laughing.

“And ever since, she’s been obsessed with this non-existent song called ‘Spank.’ The supposedly filthy, kinky one she’s forbidden to read.”

“Oooh, this is good.”

“She literally begs me to read it, Savage. But I keep tellingher no. It’s too dirty. Too personal. Not appropriate to share with someone who’s merely a friend.”

Savage is laughing his ass off now. “This is amazing. Dangle those non-existent dirty lyrics like a dick-shaped carrot, baby. Get her simmering in her own juices.”

“My thoughts exactly. Well, that and it’s better for her to think I’ve written a dirty song called ‘Spank’ that she’s not allowed to read than to let her read the actual words I wrote about her in a song called ‘Spark.’”

“It’s not something a Doberman would write, I’m assuming?”

“Definitely not. It’s this angsty, pining mess of a confessional, basically.”

“Oh, Kendrick.”

“Whatever.” I wave at the air. “The actual lyrics don’t matter. The important thing is that she’s been obsessed with what shethinksI wrote.” I grin. “So, get this. I found my old lyrics notebook from last year and decided to use it as a decoy.” I crack up. “I left it in the top drawer of my nightstand for her to find on day one, along with some other stuff to get her motor running: handcuffs, a shit-ton of condoms, and the biggest bottle of lube you’ve ever seen in your goddamned life.”

We both cackle with glee.

“Brilliant!”

“And sure enough, just like I knew she would, the kid went straight to snooping for that damned notebook the second I left the room to work out. She found the fake one I’d left for her in record speed, along with all the rest of the stuff!”

“Nice!”

“And, yes, right before she did that, I took off my shirt in front of her before heading into my workout, like you told me to do. Actually, I peeled that shirt off, like I was starring inMagic Mike.”

“Atta boy.”

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