Page 18 of Our Moon
Evie looks thoughtful. “That must be tough. I couldn’t even imagine.” She shakes her head as if to clear the thoughts from it. She looks over to me and smiles, “I think you’ll get your answers. One way or another, I think you’ll get them.”
For some reason, her firm statement makes me believe her. She seems certain, and I decide that I’m going to borrow her confidence and believe I will get answers.
***
We’ve only been in two stores, and I already have six bags full of clothes. According to Evie, we haven’t even put a dent in Trevor’s credit limit yet, but we haven’t hit the shoe store yet, so there’s that.
We’re sitting in the food court, munching on some bourbon chicken, a mall food court staple according to Evie, when she says she needs to go to Victoria’s Secret.
“Yeah, I could use some new bras and panties, too,” I say in response.
Evie giggles. “That’snotwhy I’m going there.”
I give her a puzzled expression, “Why then?”
“I feel like a whale and need some sexy nighties and shit to feel more desirable,” she says simply, like that answer should have been obvious.
“But you’re pregnant,” I say obtusely.
She full out laughs now, drawing attention from neighboring tables. “Exactly! I swear my libido has gotten a million times worse since I got knocked up. I thought I was horny before? Man, pre-pregnant Evie has nothing on pregnant Evie.”
“Huh.” Interesting, I guess.
“You should get yourself somethin’ sexy, too.” I shoot my eyes up at her, and she winks.
“What’s the point?” I ask, looking down again as I fiddle with the remaining rice on my plate.
“Every woman should have a little somethin’ in their wardrobe that makes them feel sexy. Even if it’s just a lacy bra and panty set.”
“It’s not like there’s anyone to see them,” I say to my plate.
“Are you a virgin, Ally?” Evie asks quietly after a moment, and with what sounds like wonder in her voice.
My eyes shoot up to hers again. “I don’t know,” I spit out.
Her eyes widen. “Oh my Lord. I didn’t even think about that! You don’t have anyone you can ask?”
“Yeah,” I laugh. “Let me go ask Alex if I’m a virgin. I don’t know my former self at all, but I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t have sharedthatwith her brother.”
Evie rolls her eyes at me. “I meant a girlfriend or something. Boyfriend?”
I shake my head. “No. I know I had a boyfriend, Blake, but we broke up a year before the accident. Apparently it was bad, so I’m not sure I’d get anything out of him. My former best friend, Lucy, is MIA, and my brothers said I only ever hung out with them and the band outside of school. And I’m prettysure I never shared my sex life with the band.”
“Well, there are other ways you can find out,” she offered.
“Like what?” I wonder as I sip my Sprite.
“A doctor can tell you if your hymen is broken,” she says so matter-of-factly that I spit my Sprite out in a spray across the table. Lucky for her, it didn’t reach her side. “Gross, Ally! Man, you’ve got to be a virgin considering how much you’re blushing right now talking about this,” she laughs.
I glare at her.
“But seriously, if you can’t find your Lucy friend, maybe you can talk with a doctor. Surely they’d understand your situation given your history. You need to go for annual lady doctor appointments anyway, so it wouldn’t alert your brothers at all.”
“Honestly, I’m not even sure I want to know,” I tell her. “On the one hand, I want to know everything. On the other hand, I’ve been given a clean slate. Not too many people get that.”
“But what if there’s somethin’ worth remembering?Someoneworth remembering?” she questions.
“Then where has he been all this time?” I ponder.
