Page 34 of A Taste of Grace

Today was a test that I was about to fail. The devil was a liar, and he wouldn’t talk me out of my blessing. I texted Nita back.

Me:

Thank you so much. I receive it.

I smiled and took a deep breath, believing by faith that the manifestation of my prayers rested on my showing up today.

Later that morning, I pulled my car onto the grounds of the massive campus of Haven of Hope and Blessings, following a trail of worshippers arriving for the 9:30 service. Although Farmerton was a relatively small city, thousands of people from the tri-state area worshiped here.

Caleb’s orderly influence was everywhere from the perfectly landscaped grounds to the overall flow of the traffic and uniformity of the staff outside. Several men wearing black pants, boots, and neon orange safety vests ushered the cars into the massive, paved lot. Lexuses, Audis, Mercedes, and other luxury vehicles alerted me to the prominence of the people who would meet me inside.

I parked, grabbed my Bible and purse, and walked slowly toward the tinted double glass doors of the main building. My nervousness dissipated as I took in other aspects of the church campus and the busyness of preparation for morning worship. Parents rushed toward the side entrance to a large children’s wing with wiggly, enthusiastic children in tow. I spotted Caleb’s Lexus on the side of the administrative offices along with several other big shiny cars.

These people have money.

My eyes landed on the building to the right of the sanctuary. The words above its doors said Community Center. I could already tell it was a wonderful place that uplifted and brought people together.

“Good morning. Welcome to Haven of Hope and Blessings.” A jovial, petite woman greeted me with a smile that reminded me of my grandmother.

She extended her arms, inviting me to give her a hug, which I appreciated.

“Good morning.” I returned her smile and directed my attention to the open doors of the sanctuary.

When I walked into the open layout of the rectangular room, goodness met me. An overwhelming sense of peace that enveloped me as melodic, long musical strains that sounded like a mix of angelic notes and my yoga playlist filled the air. From the decor with banners of scripture to the raised platform and regal colors, the atmosphere indescribably soothed my spirit.

Since it was about fifteen minutes before service, I moved toward a seat in the middle of the massive room, which I guessed could hold about 2,500 people.

Despite Caleb’s instructions, I wanted to remain hidden and not sit too close to the front. Once settled, I watched as small clusters of families and friends were ushered into the space. It was rare for anyone to come in alone like me.

The meticulously dressed, no-nonsense ushers balanced order with kindness as they smiled at people who entered the sanctuary. I made a mental note to share with Caleb how friendly they were, making me feel as if they wanted me to be here.

At 9:30 a.m. on the dot, a string of dignitaries entered the side doors from the left. A man who had to be Caleb’s armor bearer preceded him, followed by Hannah and Esther. Nita already sat in the front with her signature smile.

Another woman, whom I assumed was Caleb’s mother, sat next to the girls. She leaned over them, pointing to the seats next to her. From her animated gestures, I knew she wouldn’t hesitate to reprimand them if they bounced around too much. They flipped their heads back and forth, still wearing the plaits I laid down for them Friday night. Hannah wore little yellow bows and Esther lavender ones to match her dress.

As expected, Hannah and Esther plopped their small bodies in their respective seats quickly when their grandmother gave them a stern look. The ostentatious yellow church hat with huge feathers Mrs. Stallings wore moved like a puppet with each of her gestures. When the girls met her approval, she finally settled in and held her head high, facing the raised platform in front of her. Queen Elizabeth had nothing on Church Mother Stallings and the throne she sat on as she ruled her little subjects this morning.

From behind, I observed them all closely. They were a picture-perfect family who made good choices that placed them in positions of authority and prestige. People respected and valued the Stallings. Their gifts mattered as they sowed into the community and those who needed them. Undeniable favor rested on them as they walked fully in God’s purpose.

That could be you.

I imagined sitting next to them. With my little girls, my mother-in-law, and myhusband. That image pricked my heart in a way I hadn’t expected. Did I want all of this? All of him?

I lowered my head and prayed silently, allowing quietness to overtake my spirit. In this anointed atmosphere, I tapped into a place that was now familiar. I kept praying, wondering if I could open my heart so quickly to a man I had just met.

Thirty days.

That was how long I would give Caleb to woo me. If anything became a red flag, I would go about my business and not look back.

But your heart could pay the price if something goes wrong.

Doubt instantly filled my mind. I closed my eyes to block out all distractions. After several seconds, the soft flow of praise overtook me. Like a floating body in the ocean, I lifted my hands and let go, realizing this life was no longer mine. I tried to do things my way, but I didn’t get it quite right. I wanted to surrender to something bigger than I was.

A gentle breeze moved above my head. Peace covered me like a cloak.

It’s called faith, Grace.

Perfect Timing