Page 49 of Secondhand Smoke
Nell stared at him as he paused her to explain something. She pretended to pay attention to his words, but all she could do was wonder.
She squinted and studied his face, scrutinizing it for . . . something.
She hadn’t been sure what it was about Barrett that had her spilling her secrets to him one right after the other. She recognized it now.
Once he’d said it the other night, it clicked in her mind and she was certain.
She saw herself in him.
She would have never believed it until she did. She and Barrett weresimilar.
As much as she’d looked like she had fit in, she’d never felt like it. She was hiding vital parts of herself, fearful that people would find out and turn on her.
Barrett was theonlyperson who knew her biggest secret. Not only had he kept it, but he’d gone out of his way to make her a part of his life—to help her embrace the person she shouldn’t love rather than condemn her.
It explained her draw to him.
It explained why she’d come here tonight despite everything else.
“. . . do it?”
Nell blinked and realized Barrett had just asked her a question. “What?”
“Am I boring you, Duncan?”
“No, no.” She shook her head clear of—ironically—him. “I’m sorry.”
“Hey,” he said and leaned forward so she was forced to look at him. He had a stern but playful look on his face. “Seriously, stop saying sorry. You aren’t doing anything wrong.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Dude.”
Nell huffed a laugh and dropped her head back. “It’s habit.”
“Well, break it. It’s a bad one.” He shook his head in mock disarrangement. “What are you doing on Sunday?”
“Church, as usual.”
“Right, I almost forgot.” He leaned back. “I was going to see if you wanted to come to our next gig.”
Nell perked up. “What time is it? Church gets done at one.”
“It starts at seven, but we’ll leave Gemsburg in the morning because it takes about an hour or so to drive there.”
Nell’s eager, soft smile slowed. “It’s not at The Pour House?”
“No, in Bellevue.” Barrett grinned, leaning forward with excitement as he explained, “Dennis’s uncle owns this venue there. It’s bigger than The Pour House—like, half venue, half bar—so it’s a chance for us to reach a bigger audience. We’ve only been there once before, but the turnout was sick. And you know those girls who were at The Pour House? Well, they saw us in Bellevue last time and liked us so much that they came all the way here to see us again.”
Nell was addicted to his contagious passion despite the disappointing sting in her chest. She leaned forward, grinning. “That’s amazing.”
“I know, right? It’s the biggest opportunity we’ve had so far. If this becomes a regular thing, chances are we could go even bigger. People might actually know about us.” Barrett leaned back and grinned at the ceiling like he saw something amazing there written in the popcorn pattern.
When Nell looked, all she saw was white.
“So, can you come?”
Nell bit her lip, sheepish. “I can’t.”
