Page 71 of Matched Up

But she didn’t hesitate.‘Of course I do.You deserve it, Lexie.More than anyone.’

I forgot that about Megan, that she could make me feel like I was so much better than I was.And sometimes I just needed to hear it.

‘Do you want to do some practice?’she asked, and I nodded.

Then my phone rang.

‘It’s Sadie,’ I said, and we both stared at it vibrating on my bed.

‘Answer it!’Megan said, picking it up and shoving it towards me.

‘Hello?’

I could barely hear what Sadie said beyond ‘Can you playon Saturday?’. My ears were ringing and I just about stopped myself from bursting into tears on the phone.I saved those for after.

Megan was staring at me the whole time, trying to work out what was happening.I hung up and clamped my hand over my mouth, as if that would stop the tears streaming down my cheeks.

Megan looked panicked.‘What?What happened?’

‘She wants me to play on Saturday.’

Then Megan’s arms were round me.I held on to her, wishing it was Shane I was holding on to.I wished I could send him a message to tell him I was on the team.That I’d be there too, when the scout was coming to watch him and Megan.But instead I went outside with Megan, and we trained until we were exhausted.

‘Meg, you want to watch a movie?’Niall called from the kitchen door.

I looked at her, expecting that to be the end of our training session.

‘Can’t, sorry, babe.Just doing some training with Lex,’ she shouted back, passing me the ball.‘Can I sleep in your room tonight?’she asked me.

And I felt nothing for Niall as I heard the kitchen door slam.

25

The dynamic shifted again now that me and Megan were talking.I started giving them lifts to school and Niall went back to his usual spot with his earbuds in.But it was still weird.I had to be careful about what I was talking about.No Shane, not that I wanted to bring him up, even though he was right there in my head, taking up every inch of space in my brain.This morning I’d gone into WhatsApp and hovered on his name for what felt like forever, debating whether I should send him a message or not.As soon as he came online, I locked my screen and put my phone face down, my heart beating hard, as if he could see me.I missed him.And every time I thought about how I’d ruined everything with my temper, I made myself think about the fact that he was hiding something from me and I’d given him a million chances to tell me.

‘We should celebrate,’ Megan said, putting on lipstick in the car mirror.

‘Celebrate what?’I asked, confused.

‘Being friends again.’

I couldn’t help smiling at her enthusiasm.I was happy too.It was like part of the weight that had been crushing my chest had been lifted.

‘How should we do it?Extra practice after school?’I stuck out my tongue at her as she closed her eyes and pretended to snore.‘Fine, fine.What’s your suggestion?’

She side-eyed me.‘Party?’

‘Where?’I didn’t really like house parties.But this time I was on board.A party was exactly what I needed to stop thinking about Shane and his stupid secrets.Although I don’t even know if that would work.I was torturing myself with images of Shane with other girls.And there was nothing to prove anything, but my mind wouldn’t leave me alone, telling me repeatedly that the big secret was that he already had a girlfriend.

Megan looked at me.‘Aren’t your parents going away this weekend?’

I laughed because it was such a ridiculous suggestion.‘Are you serious?My dad would go mental,’ I said, glancing in the mirror to check that Niall still had his earbuds in.

‘That’s what Niall said.But it would just be alittleparty.’Megan fluttered her eyelashes at me.

Niall being against the idea made the suggestion so much more attractive.

I smiled.‘I’m in.’

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