Page 35 of Heart Sick Hate

She turns to walk away, breaking gazes before the first tear manages to break from her lashes and swim over her now rosy cheek.

“You don’t even like him.” I point out, rage boiling inside me.

She shakes her head but doesn’t face me. “I don’t like you either. And look how that’s going.”

10

Echo

“This isn’t what Ihad in mind when you said we were having a girls’ day.” Maren frowns, skimming the crowd of buttoned-up Christians.

“Sorry.” I hand her a box of clothes, and she takes it. “Promise we aren’t staying, but I had to drop off a few things to my dad.”

Maren hip-checks me. “Or you’re just looking for an excuse to see that hot boy-toy of yours.”

Her eyes flick up to where Rhett is standing near the front of the church with the most blinding smile. Pure, holy light shining.

“Wait, what was that?” Maren crosses her arms over her chest, and I realize my hands are clenched at my sides and my jaw is tense.

“Nothing,” I lie, even if it’s no one’s fault but mine all my emotions are welling to the surface today.

But as I watch Rhett talking to one of the members of his congregation, holding her perfectly manicured hand and smiling, I’m jealous at how good he is at hiding it, while I’m failing miserably.

Is it really that simple for him to bury any guilt, or does he not have any? Because we aren’t actually in love. And for the first time since I made this arrangement that fact bothers me.

All because of his sick, sadistic, orgasm-inducing brother.

I’m going to scream, and in this room, it’ll echo all the way up to the heavens.

I spin around before that happens and grab another box, trying to ignore the fire welling up inside me.

“I get the impression I shouldn’t ask…” Maren starts. “But you look like you’re five seconds away from blowing a gasket. What gives?”

“Rhett’s fucking his receptionist.” It spills out when it shouldn’t. “Maybe others too. I don’t really know.”

It’s not like Maren will judge. And if I don’t talk to someone I’m going to explode. She’s a better option than Crew. At least with her, I’ll vent with my words. If I’m alone with Crew again I’m afraid he’ll put me into submission with his tongue.

My cheeks heat at the memory of last night.

If I thought I’d experienced an orgasm before, I was wrong. My hand is nothing compared to whatever Crew did to me. It was an out-of-body experience. A baptism.

I walked through his doors one person and walked out another.

But what’s worse is that it was supposed to be just sex. I hate Crew enough that there was no risk I’d fall for him. Good old revenge and a hate fuck.

Why did he have to go turning it all on its head?

First, he refused to fuck me, which is exactly when I should have left. Then he used his tongue to drive my sanity off a cliff. But worst of all, it was the look in his eyes when I was almost blacked out. It was his fingers grazing the back of mine. It was how he kissed me between the legs like he cared more about how I felt in that moment than anything else. And it was how he tucked me in his sheets after when he should have been an asshole and kicked me out.

But then he has the nerve to wear my purity ring around his neck like he’s taunting me with the fact that I begged him to take my virginity. I might have offered last night, but I can’t act on it now. It’s already too convoluted.

I need to hate him. End of story.

“Rewind.” Maren tugs my arm until I’m facing her. “Rhett’s fucking other women.”

I nod, my face pinching because there’s only so much I should probably explain. “It’s a long story.”

“Because you don’t actually like him?” Maren’s eyes narrow as they focus on me. “Come on girl, I’m not blind. I’ve been egging you on for the last ten minutes trying to get you to say something nice about your boyfriend, and you haven’t even batted an eyelash. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out you’re not feeling him. So why don’t you end it?”

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