Page 130 of Heart Sick Hate

Just because I’ve been hurt doesn’t mean I can’t heal.

With Dad’s encouragement, I started seeing a therapist. And even if I’ve only been twice, I’m on a path. One I hope leads me in a better direction.

I’m lucky to have a father like mine. He’s strong for me even when these past few weeks haven’t been any easier on him.

After what happened with Rhett, Eternal Light is still reeling, and he’s been busy rebuilding what Rhett was slowly taking apart behind everyone’s back. He’s still trying to track all the money Rhett hid, while regaining the trust of the congregation in the process.

The fallout has taken its toll on everyone, but at least I have Dad.

And Crew.

He’s supported me through all of it. He and Adam organized to have my apartment emptied, and all my things brought to Crew’s place. I didn’t even fight him on it.

So many years I had spent pretending to be happy with the choices I was making, but it was all fake. And now that I have someone who loves me, accepts me, protects me. I’m not letting him go.

The fact that Crew had never invited a woman to his apartment before we met, and now he refuses to let me leave, feels like breaching a first with him. In our own ways, we hand each other pieces of ourselves we haven’t trusted with anyone.

“No clients today?” I ask, looking around. It’s past eleven and usually, at least a couple of us are already locked in our rooms.

“Not until later. We wanted to catch up first,” Jude says.

Fel nuzzles against him. “Look at you, being all sweet.”

“I’m not sweet.” He narrows his eyes. “It’s a fact. It’s busier when she’s not here.”

I roll my eyes, knowing he’s lying to himself. The guys love to act tough, but they’ve both been texting me as often as Fel and Maren.

“And the fights have been too easy without you around, man. When are you coming back?”

“Soon,” Crew says. “We’ll see.”

“A hundred hearts broke the moment the ring girls learned Crew Kingsley was off the market.” Maren laughs.

“Good.” I wiggle and Crew grabs me tighter. “He’s mine.”

Crew dips his mouth to my ear. “You know it, Goldie.”

“All right. Enough of the small talk, who wants a drink?” Maren pulls out a bottle of champagne and walks around the counter, handing it to Jude.

He pulls his knife out of his back pocket and flips it open, taking it to the bottle and popping it open in one swift motion. A move Fel seems to appreciate as she pulls his mouth to hers the second he hands the bottle back to Maren.

“Gross.” Maren frowns at them. “Get a fucking room.”

“Okay.” Jude tries to tug Fel down the hall, but she plants herself in place.

“Later.” She grins, rubbing his arm.

Sage looks as disgusted as Maren, turning his back on the happy couple.

I can’t help but wonder if that’s what Crew and I look like to them. Not that I care.

Maren pours glasses of champagne, and everyone takes one for the cheers. But when they turn away, I hand it to Crew, not taking a sip. Instead, he walks it back over to the counter and Jude drags him into an argument he’shaving with Maren about if Fel should be allowed to walk the ring at another one of his fights.

“Saw that.” Sage knocks my shoulder, stopping beside me. “Please tell me he didn’t knock you up already.”

“He didn’t knock me up.”

“Good.” Sage smiles with relief, and I’m not sure he’ll ever be one to settle down or think about a family. “Then what’s the deal?”

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