Page 16 of Booth

They talked about their parents more after that.Some of the things they did had been illegal, and he wondered how they’d never gotten into trouble for some of it.Like leaving them at home when they were just eight and ten years old.Having them mow the lawn at the same age.But the thing that kept coming to his mind was the bar and the number of times they took them there, and it being really late, and them having them go out to the car and sleep.Alone.It’s a small wonder that something didn’t happen to them when they’d been so neglected.

“I can’t believe how they raised us.And the things that we learned from them.This has been an enlightening thing, if you ask me.I don’t know why I’m helping them out.”Shawn thought about it for a few seconds.“I’m helping them out because they’re my parents, and there isn’t anyone else to do it for them.Besides, I never wanted to burden you with them.I did remember how they treated you, and I’m ashamed that I did the same with your money.”

“It’s all water under the bridge now, as they say.I moved away from all of you when I was old enough, and I managed to save some money and get myself a nice place to live.I had a car and a home, and I was…Well, I thought that I had enough.Then I met Booth, and everything I thought that I had meant very little to me after him.He was and is my world.I love him so very much.”Shawn told her that it showed on her face, too.“I feel it.It’s wonderful being in love, isn’t it?”

“Yes, I don’t know what I’d do without Doug and his love.It’s a powerful thing, love.And it makes the things that you thought were terrible seem less so with someone around to share them with.I know that is what he’s done for me.”He laughed a little.“Not that it didn’t take me a while to learn a new way to look at things.I wanted until there was nothing left in the relationship.He taught me that having it all doesn’t mean the same as the way I was brought up.And he was right.Having love made me see things that I’ve never dealt with before.”

“I have found that I do miss my other life a bit.Teaching dance was fun for me, and it kept food on my table and a roof over my head.I do miss it, but not as much as I thought that I would when they first thought that I was going to be paralyzed.”She smiled at him, and he returned it to her.“I love talking to you about how we grew up, but there has to be more than that between us.I don’t want to avoid you because of the memories that it brings back.Let’s strive to have better memories and ones that are with the ones that we’ve fallen in love with from now on.All right?”

“Yes, I agree.I don’t want our time to be messed up with just bad memories.You’re right about that.”He took her much smaller hand into his and kissed the back of it.“I’m so glad that I reached out to find you, Dee.I guess that’s one good thing that we got from Lynn being off her medications.Is that the two of us, well, the three of us can connect again.Lynn is in a much better place than she was before since she’s gotten on medications that keep her well.”

He talked to her about Lynn and what she was up to.She wasn’t saying much now that she was medicated.He looked over at his older sister and felt something tug at his heart for her.She’d never find anyone to love her, not in the condition she was in now.Without her medications, she would bejust as she’d been growing up.Someone like he’d been when he’d been younger, without the chemical imbalance going on too.He also realized then that while he loved her, he didn’t much care for Lynn, and he wasn’t sure that he had in a long time.Putting her in the nursing home like he was going to do with Dee’s help would free him up from the burden of keeping an eye on her, too, and he found that he liked that idea.She was a burden, and she was hard to keep under control.

After dinner was over and it had been fun too, they talked about the things that were upcoming for them.The holidays for him meant that they’d have Doug’s family over for dinner several times, and they’d decorate the house for the seasons.Since this was Dee’s first holiday season with Booth and his family, she didn’t know what they’d be doing, but she knew it would be epic with them all around.Even with small children, something that Doug’s family didn’t have any of anymore, they’d be celebrating big and having a wonderful start to the new year when it came around, too.

Taking his sister to the nursing home in the evening felt better for him than something he’d done for Lynn in a long time.He couldn’t believe how much he was looking forward to someone else taking care of her.She was his sister, he knew that, but she was ill, and it was making him ill to be responsible for her all the time, too.On his way home, he called Doug.

“I’m coming home to be with you.”Doug asked how that was different than before.“Because I want to be with you instead of us being together because of some kind of twist of fate.I’m in love with you instead of just being with you.I’m not making any sense, am I?”

“You aren’t, not really.I thought that you loved me before going to Ohio?I mean, what’s changed?”He told him everything that he and his sister had talked about.How his childhood wasn’t as good or even nearly as good as he’d thought it had been.Being with him had made him realize that nothing about his life had been normal, and he had that now.“Are you saying that you’ve settled with me because I’m normal?I still don’t understand.I’m sorry.I know you’re trying to tell me, but I’m thinking that you’re wanting to break off with me.”

“Never.I love you with all that I am.And that’s the truth, too.Everything in my soul is for you to love you.I never…I don’t want to break it off with you.You’ve given me something that I never realized I didn’t have.You’ve given me a life that I needed and have cherished since we met.You’re my everything.”Doug laughed.“I’m sorry.I’ve messed this up when all I wanted to tell you was that I’ve fallen in love with you so deeply.And fully that I never want to go another day without telling you how much I love you.”

“You’re doing just fine if you want to do that daily.I love you as well.Very much so.”He felt like he was still messing up, but let it go.He’d show him daily how much he loved him, and that would make it just right.“Come home and we’ll start our new life from today, all right?We’ll be the family that we’ve meant to be all along.I will tell you that I have to meet your sister after this.Whatever she did, I owe her for whatever she did to bring this sort of love out of you and to me.”

“She’d not see it that way.She’d only say that we were talking and that was it.She did tell me that we needed to not dwell on the past anymore, or we’ll avoid each other.That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you.The past is in the past, and it’s time that the two of us started living and loving for the future.That’s what I’ve been trying to say all along.”Doug told him that he’d said that perfectly.“Good.I’ve gotten it clear for you.Also, Dee is going to take over the money for my parents’ nursing home fees.That will help us a great deal in being able to travel like we wanted to.Lynn is going to be in the nursing home from now on, so I won’t have to worry about her not taking her medications and getting out and about.She needed constant care, and Dee made sure that she found someone who would do that for us.She’s, Dee has been a great deal of help for me getting my head screwed on right too.I’m coming home, Doug.A home that I want to build on with you.”

“I love you, Shawn.When you get here, I want a hug from you in the worst sort of way.”He agreed that was what he wanted as well.”

The rest of the drive home was done with the two of them making plans about their future.He’d not realized how much he was burdening their relationship by taking care of his family all the time had been.Now he was going to live and love.He was going to make memories that he could take tohis sister, because she was the one who had encouraged him to do this, so they’d have something else to talk about other than the burdens of their family.Yes, he thought, he was looking forward to having a life without all the other things going on around him and having a good life.He didn’t deserve it; he needed it.

~*~

Falkner needed a break from studying.He’d been working on his education in one form or another since he’d been in pre-school at the age of five.Once he took his state boards, he was going to take a month off and go and see some of the world that he’d been reading about.It was his time, and he was going to enjoy it to the max.Tomorrow, when he was finished up, he was going to get in his car and take off.

“What time do you have to be there in the morning?”He told his brother Cullen that he needed to leave the house at six-thirty to be there on time at seven.“All right.Let’s you and I go and get some breakfast in the morning, and I’ll drop you off.Also, pick you up.”

“I’m leaving as soon as I’m finished.I’ve packed my bag and I’m going to the airport as soon as I turn in my test.”He seemed to know that by the look on his face.“You know something that I don’t.”

“I do.A party that mom and dad are throwing for you.”He said he didn’t want that.“I didn’t figure you would, but they want you to have a great send-off.They’re sending you away, too.On a three-month cruise.So that’s what you’re going to do.”

“I want to go where I want.”He said that he could after the three months.“But you don’t understand.I want to just roam around.”

“I do understand.More than you can understand what they’ve been giving up for you to be able to do this.”He asked what he meant.“They didn’t move into a smaller house because they didn’t want to interrupt your studies.They didn’t go on any cruises of their own, so that they could be there if anything happened and take care of it for you.You owe them.”

“Gee, thanks.”He thought about the house and how he’d not had to do anything but do his lessons while they held the house down for him.“I guess I’ve been study blind for them, right?I mean, right off the top of my head, I can remember several times when they stopped talking about something when I came into the room.And that’s been in the last week.I just blew it off as they were planning their own vacation.”

“Nope, they’ve been wanting to move out of the big house since Dallas got married and built his own home.They want something much smaller than a ten-bedroom home that they have completely outgrown.”Cullen laughed a little.“I think they outgrew it when I left home, but by then, you were in college with Booth, and they stayed.Then you decided to get your doctoral degree, and they stayed again.They’ve been holding down the fort for a long time, and they want to celebrate you getting your schooling finished up.”

“I didn’t get it, did I?”Cullen told him that he was getting it now and that was all that mattered.“Yes, I suppose, but I was really looking forward to going to the airport and telling them I wanted a ticket on the next flight out and didn’t care where I was going.”

“That might well have been someplace close, and I know you didn’t want that.”He said he was going to pay more attention from now on.“Don’t.You’re kind of fun when you’re like this.Not knowing what’s going on around you.I love being able to tease you into things.But the party is a must-attend.You have to let them do this.And by the time you get back from your cruise, the house will be yours anyway.”

“I don’t want a ten-bedroom house.”He realized how loud he’d been and cleared his throat.“I don’t have any use for a ten-bedroom home, Cullen.I’m going to have enough on my plate just trying to find a place that will allow me to work for them when I fail my exams.”The pop to the back of his head had him bouncing off the table he was sitting at.“What was that for?”

“You’re not going to fail your exams, dummy.I’m going to be surprised if you don’t ace it.You’ve been studying for a long time for them.Since we were in college together anyway.”Falkner admitted something to his brother that he’d not admitted to anyone else before.“I know that you’re tired.I don’tsee how you couldn’t be tired.I’m right there with you, and I’ve had the last five months off.Sometimes I wonder if what I did was even worth it, but then I look around my new home and I realize that I’ve done all right for myself.And for the family, too.It’s been hard sometimes.I still have nightmares that would scare a regular person to death, but I’m getting better at sleeping all night now.”

“And you do a lot of things for the family, too.Don’t think that I’ve had my head in my books for so long that I didn’t notice you.You’re the best there is for a baby brother.”Falkner laughed and hugged his brother.“I know, too, that you’ve been running point for me, too.Making sure that my car is working and has gas in it, when I would forget to check.I also noticed too that you’ve been shoveling the drive when I needed to get out.Little things, sure, but they’ve meant the world to me.I noticed, but was too buried in my books to have said anything.So I will now.Thank you so much for being there for me.”

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