Page 20 of The Protégé

Inquire at your own risk.

That had been her warning for those who wanted to ask a question, but didn’t know what to expect. Over the course of two years, I’d read her replies to people. She’d replied to three of mine. But her last reply was the most interesting of the three.

I’d never heard of her until I overheard a couple talking at an airport. The wife claimed that Madame Sarcasm had helped her untangle her anxiety. Since I had my own psychological issues, my curiosity had been piqued. No therapist had helped me, and I’d paid a lot of money for the best of the best. I’d checked out Madame Sarcasm’s website and realized it was her ability to take people out of their confined head space that made her successful. She did it indirectly by making it fun and not forceful. I didn’t know if she knew what she was doing, but many people had benefited from her style.

The bio picture that had been on her website showed a lady with silver hair wearing eccentric glasses with catlike eyes. I wondered if my mother knew her. They would’ve been great friends.

I reread her reply to my inquiry from a year ago.

Dear Asteroid Curious,

You have a very fascinating name. Great way to catch my attention. Your question piques my interest. Life is all about exploring unfamiliar areas, and you’ve allowed me to step into a place I hadn’t been before.

I’ll put your question below for everyone’s reference so they know I didn’t come up with this weird shit.

Question: If you were an asteroid floating in space and a bright star blocked your view of Earth, what would you do?

Answer: First of all, it would make sense for me to give myself a name. Please call me Sassteroid. I love traveling through space with my partner, but then he strays, gazing at other asteroids. He tells me he needs some space, pun intended.

The Universe hears him and answers the request.I’m minding my own business, admiring the mesmerizing nebula, when a dying star bursts and tosses me away from my home—away fromhim.

Isuppose my ex’s wish comes true. He has all the space he wants now. Thank the gods.

With renewed independence, I explore the vastness before me because staying stagnant is boring. I approach a cluster of glittering stars. But there’s one particular star that’s so bright, it blocks my view of the Earth.

I quiet my mind and hear the stars whisper to each other. The cosmic chatter is quite interesting. I understand their conversation through the cosmic vibration. Do they know that I’m close by? Probably. Do they care? Probably not.

Why?

Because I’m a small asteroid, not a big and respectable planet. What exactly can I do to them?

Perhaps a kind approach will suffice in this situation. If he says no, then he doesn’t deserve to be a shining star.

I come up to him. “May I please join your cluster?”

To my surprise, he replies,“Oh dear little asteroid. Come into the light. Let’s all get along and not fight.”

My asteroid brain is stunned. I don’t know what to say to this poetic star that just made my universe brighter and more hopeful.

I hope my reply puts a smile on your face. Thank you and all of my readers for three years of wonderful sarcasm and support. When I started this blog, it was just for fun. I didn’t think people would send me so many questions.

But it’s time for me to move on. Maybe I’ll return one day.

For now,ciao ciao.

Madame Sarcasm

The first time I read her reply, I cracked up so hard. All the comments below the post were mostly laughing or heart emojis. I knew her reply would be unique, but I didn’t expect this level of personification. Her response took my imagination to new places.

Whenever I looked up at the sky, I wondered if there was an asteroid making friends with some stars. Of course, no one would ever know this about me.

Sometimes people appeared in your life for a specific reason, and Elena had reminded me of a person who had helped me deal with my anxiety.

I should have gone to bed, but since I was feeling extra energetic now, I reviewed the notes regarding my mentor’s death. I looked at his apartment documents. He bought that apartment a long time ago, before we even met. I thought he bought it only five years ago.

But then again, I owned several properties all over the world and had never told him either. Maybe he needed a place to store his treasures. I didn’t know if The Trogyn knew about me and him. Regardless, I had to be a few steps ahead of them.

CHAPTER EIGHT

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