Page 97 of Breaking Matt
Iwokeup feeling stiff and sore. Mark was sleeping beside me in the chair. I tried to sit up and shift to ease the pain.
"Not so easy to sleep in a hospital bed," Mark murmured as he straightened up in the chair beside me.
"About as comfortable as sleeping on that chair looks," I said. He smiled briefly.
The seriousness I was so used to seeing on his face returned.
"You did a pretty stupid thing," he said as he sat forward slightly.
I nodded. "I couldn't do nothing."
"It was my job to keep you safe."
"You can't blame yourself," I assured him. "You were trying to keep the danger out. You had no idea I was going to try and expose myself to it."
He studied me for a moment. "Trust me, I want to yell at you and tell you how stupid it was to do what you did...but it's over."
"I'm sorry," I murmured.
"Knowing why you did it makes it easier to handle. That and the fact that you're safe now."
"Where's Matthew?"
"He isn't here." I had already guessed that much. Did he care so little that now that the threat was over he was gone? Had I misjudged him before?
Were his reasons for meeting with Nick different from those I'd hoped they were? The only other reason I could think for prompting him into action would be to ensure there was no longer a threat to me, and he wouldn't be required to keep me safe. Was it his way of moving on?
I rubbed my forehead, not sure what to think anymore.
"I've never seen him look at a girl the way he looks at you." My eyes met his. I wanted to believe him, but I believed Matthew's actions now spoke volumes.
If he truly cared, he would have been here with me.
"I think I was just a job he is happy to be done with," I mumbled, letting out an emotional sigh.
"Give him a chance to deal. He'll be back," Mark said.
But he didn't come back the next day, not even when I got discharged from the hospital and was sent home.
And for the next few days there was no sign of him, either. Mark was still assigned as my bodyguard. It wasn't like there was a clear threat anymore, but my father wasn't taking any chances. I let it slide. After everything I had put my parents through, I owed them that much; so instead of kicking up a fuss or moaning about it, I shut up.
Although I was still physically recovering and hurting emotionally, the weight of life and death had been lifted from my shoulders. When Nick had told Matthew he would take care of Leo and Frank, I knew he had meant it. When a few days later a folder was left on my father's office desk with enough information to put Leo and Frank away for the rest of their lives, I wasn't surprised.
Brandy got her car back and a full rundown of what happened. Like everyone else she was just grateful I was safe.
My body began to mend but I couldn't say the same for my heart. I wanted to believe that after everything I had been through I would be able to go back to the life I had led before.
Once I'd healed enough I invited a few friends over to my parents' house. Mark had just raised an eyebrow when twenty of my friends arrived for the planned pool party. After being cooped up alone for so long, I needed company, and I believed a party would help me ease back into my old life.
I wasn't sure how the college thing would work out. I'd missed a lot of coursework, but I had been working hard to play catch-up.
There had still been no word from Matthew. More than a few times after experiencing a few moments of my strong emotions for him, I had resisted the urge to call him. He had walked out of my life without a backward glance, now leaving me convinced that my actions had dissolved any future for us.
That night I had even invited a cute guy from high school who I had found very attractive. His name was Liam. But when he'd arrived, my initial excitement had waned when I hadn't felt the same level of attraction to him.
Beside the pool, while my friends partied, I sat on the lounger sipping a soda, feeling more alone than I had before.
"You okay?" Mark's voice pulled me out of my pity party.
