Page 29 of The Silencer

"Perfect," Lisa says."And hey, no alcohol involved.Orna lost her mind last night.She’s claiming I’m giving her grey hairs."

I feel a pang of guilt, remembering how our drinking has escalated lately."Yeah, you're right.Dr.Murphy suggested I try journaling or art therapy.Maybe we could do something like that together?"

Lisa's eyes light up."Ooh, art therapy sounds fun.You could get some canvases and paint, make a mess in the backyard.I’m sure Tammy wouldn't mind as long as you clean up after yourself."

For the first time in days, I feel a genuine smile spread across my face."I need something constructive to do," I tell her softly.“Maybe art therapy is the way to go.”

Just then, we hear Tammy calling from downstairs."Clodagh, sweetheart?It's time to head home."

I stand up, feeling lighter than I have in a long time."Thanks, Lisa.For everything.You're a great friend."

Lisa pulls me into another hug."Right back at you.And remember, I'm always here if you need to talk.Or if you need someone to punch a bitch for you."

I laugh, shaking my head."Let's try to avoid any more punching, okay?"

Tammy smiles at me as we reach the bottom of the stairs."Ready to go home, sweetheart?"

I nod, feeling a warmth in my chest at the word 'home'.Because that's what Tammy's house has become for me—a home.A safe place where I can heal, where I can be myself, where I can slowly learn to live again.

As we drive home, I look out the window at the setting sun.Tomorrow is a new day, a chance to keep moving forward.And for the first time in a long time, I find myself looking forward to it.

TWELVE

emmanuel

"I don't knowwhat you want from me," she says, her voice filled with anger."I can't forgive you.I can't forget what happened."

Fuck, coming here wasn’t the right decision.I should have let her be."I understand.I don't expect you to.I just...I needed you to know that I'm sorry.That if I could go back and change things, I would.In a heartbeat."

She takes a deep breath."I can't forgive you," she repeats."But...I hear you.Your apology.I hear it."

I come awake with a start.Fuck, I should have stayed away from her.I should have never thought about speaking with her.Nothing good was ever going to come from it.

I turn over and reach for my cell.Five-thirty a.m.Fuck, it’s still early.I’m in Argentina and have been now for the past two weeks.I’ve been scouting out the city, ready to get the perfect shot this evening.

It’s been two weeks since my talk with Clodagh and she’s been in my dreams every fucking night.I thought speaking with her would give me closure, but instead, it’s fucking with my head.I fucked up.I should have left everything well enough alone.

I splash some cold water on my face, trying to shake off the lingering unease from the dream.I have a job to do here.I can't afford to be distracted.

I head out for an early morning run, hoping the physical exertion will help clear my mind.The streets of Buenos Aires are just starting to come alive as I jog through them.There are people rushing around, some on their way to work, others just out and about.

As I run, I try to focus on the job ahead.My target is Carlos Mendoza, a corrupt politician with ties to drug cartels.He's scheduled to give a speech at a rally this evening—the perfect opportunity for a clean shot.

But my mind keeps drifting back to Clodagh.The pain in her eyes when she saw me.The tremor in her voice as she spoke.

"You could have stopped him," she had said."You could have saved them."

I push myself harder, my feet pounding the pavement as I try to outrun the guilt.But it's no use.Her words echo in my head, drowning out everything else.

By the time I make it back to my hotel room, I'm drenched in sweat and gasping for breath.But my mind is no clearer than when I left.

I check my phone.There's a message from Cole:

Confirmation on tonight's event.Target will arrive at 7p.m.You'll have a 10-minute window for the shot.Don't miss it.

I stare at the message, my finger hovering over the reply button.For the first time since I started this work, I'm hesitating.Questioning.

Is this really who I want to be?The Silencer, taking lives from the shadows?Or am I just perpetuating the cycle of violence that destroyed Clodagh's life—and mine?I shake my head, trying to get rid of these thoughts.I can't afford doubts.Not now.Not with a job to do.

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