Page 37 of Outspoken

He blinks. “That's your takeaway?”

“Yeah, and you're in the wrong career. You'd make an awesome detective.”

He leans against the outside wall of the gym, watching the dog across the street as it sniffs around a pizza place. “Look,” he says. “I don't know the details of what's been happening behind my back, and I don't care. You should stay away from Amber.”

“Are you worried I'd hurt her?”

He laughs, his smile reaching his blue eyes and lighting them up. His amusement goes on way too long and my expression drops.

He wipes moisture from his eye. “You? Fuck no. You'd be the best guy she's ever dated. Chances are higher she’d hurt you, but that's not it either.” He gives me a pointed look, all joy gone from his face. “Seems like the two of you would implode. Self-destruct together. You haven’t experienced how my sister gets. You don’t know her well enough.”

My heart sinks to the ground. First Amber, now Brody—I'm getting attacked from all angles lately.

Before I can defend myself, he adds, “Amber's in a dangerous spot. She's never been sober this long, and I'm worried she's pushing herself with school. Even before the accident, she never dealt well with stress and pressure. I love you, man, but you’re too much for her. Amber doesn't tolerate clinginess, and she struggles to let people in. You won’t like her control streak and how much she argues. The two of you together feels like a collision.”

I don’t agree, but I’m not going to argue. He’s only looking out for her—actually, for both of us. Since we’ve built up a lot of trust, I have to be honest with him, though. I’ve been kinda shady and I won’t do that anymore.

I shove my hands in my pockets. “If I ignore your advice and start something with Amber, are you going to hate me and kick my ass? I’ll honor the bro code if you really forbid it. I don’t want to ruin our friendship.”

He pats my shoulder. This time, his meaty hand isn’t so aggressive. “You’re an adult. Can’t force you to do anything. Make your own mistakes and suffer the consequences. Amber can also make her own decisions, and I’ve really never been able to stop her. But I’mstronglyagainst this. I won’t kick your ass or hate you, but if you start something and it implodes, think where that leaves me. You won’t be able to visit when she’s around. Puts a strain on things.”

I nod, defeated yet again, and follow him back inside. “Am I still invited to dinner?”

He smiles. “See you at six.”

WHEN I SHOW UP AT Brody’s place after work, I ring the doorbell and wait on the porch. The late-afternoon sun is making everything orange, and I’m enjoying the mellow vibes. It sure feels better than the friction between me and Brody around lunchtime. He was relaxed the rest of the afternoon, so maybe he’s feeling better since our heart-to-heart.

I glance across the street at the neighbor's house. I have yet to meet Frank, and it doesn’t look like I’ll meet him today since he isn’t home. I wonder if Amber is home. She only lives a few spots down. It’s hard not to focus on that.

She’s so close.

I’ve reflected on my situation all day, and I'm at a loss. Amber is still upset about our argument because she won’t respond to my texts—not that she responded much in the past. Brody's warning is still circling in my head—what if pushing for something with Amber makes everything strained? I know I shouldn’t push. I don’t want to. But does that mean I’m giving up?

Before the whole gym incident, I had given up, but now everything in my heart is stirring again. Despite what she thinks, I know I feel something. I’m happy when she’s near and think about her all the time. She’s fun to flirt with, sexy as hell, and I love her assertiveness. She's funny and smart. And something between us feels different from any other woman I’ve been with. It’s not something I fully understand yet, only that she fills me with hope and makes me feel less weighed down by life.

I don’t know every part of her—like Brody said—but that’s what relationships are for. Amber just needs to give us a chance.

But…I’m also supposed to be surrendering and committing to the single life.

There are too many paths and I don’t know which one to take.

Before coming here, I checked on Mom and gave her an update on my personal life, which I suspect is her main source of entertainment. When I told her what was happening and said that it was proof there was no greater plan—that it was all too confusing with no clear direction about what to do—she smiled and made me light another Santa Muerte candle. I wish Patty would stop buying those for her.

“No matter what you choose,” Mom said, “you’ll end up right where you’re meant to be.”

So cryptic.

Paige opens the door and bounces into a hug. I laugh, hugging her back. She grabs my hand, yanking me inside. Ever since she moved back in with Brody, I’ve come over every few weeks for dinner or Sunday brunch. Amber never joins us, despite Paige begging her to. I thought that was my signal that Amber was through with me, but after she showed up at the gym, I'm not so sure.

Brody is in the kitchen cooking something on the stove. Though it seems like he'd be clumsy considering his size, he's graceful when cooking, every movement efficient and confident. I sniff the air, my stomach growling at the buttery garlic scent. I also smell an herbal tomato sauce that makes my mouth water.

Brody gives me a nod. “Hey.”

“Hey.”

I stare at the black shirt stretched across his broad back, chewing my inner cheek. I’m happy to know he’s not going to beat my ass, but I’m too exposed. Now that he knows what’s up, I’m not sure how to act. It's probably a good thing Amber isn’t joining us.

Paige pulls out a chair for me.

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