Page 60 of Set me Free

"Shut the fuck up Sienna, seriously."

The table went silent. My daddy set his fork down slowly, sighing. Sevyn rubbed his face, already knowing this was about to go south. But I didn’t care. I was done; was done dealing with this shit constantly, was done pretending that it didn’t matter.

"You always got something to say about my life," I snapped, my voice shaking with anger, with years of built-up frustration. "And I’m sick of it."

Sienna arched a brow, completely unbothered. "Watch your mouth, Serenity. "

"Tuh. You don’t respect me anyway, so what’s the difference?" I shot back.

"Oh, here we go again," she scoffed, sipping her wine. "The victim act. You always walk around like you were wronged, like I was some horrible mother. Meanwhile, I gave you a damn good life."

I laughed. A short, humorless laugh that made her eyes narrow slightly.

"A good life?" I repeated, shaking my head. "You mean money? Clothes? A big house? That’s what you think makes you a mother? Because you can buy me things?"

Her jaw tightened.

"Let’s talk about the times you ignored me," I said, my voice stronger now, filled with fire as I slowly lifted from my seat. "Allthe times you put work before me, all the times you looked at me like I was a burden. Let’s talk about how you never had a good thing to say about me. How you only open your mouth to insult me, to tear me down. Let’s talk about how you treat Sevyn like a king, but you act like I don’t even exist. I, your only daughter, your only biological child."

Lenox tried to interject. "Serenity, baby?—"

"No!" I cut him off, my chest rising and falling heavily. "I wanna know, Sienna. What the fuck is your problem with me? What have I ever done to you that make you treat me like shit all the time?”

I stared at my mother and she stared back. Slowly a smirk appeared on her face as she too lifted from her seat. Then, she said it. The words that had always been unspoken, but deeply felt.

"You," she said pointing her long coffin nails in my face, her voice sharp, raw. "You are my fucking problem, Serenity. You always have been. You almost ruined my career. My pregnancy was terrible with you, and I knew you were going to be a thorn in my side. I resent you for it."

The air left my lungs. The entire room went dead silent. Sevyn’s fork clattered onto his plate. My daddy’s eyes widened; pure shock written all over his face. And me? I just…stood there. My entire world cracking beneath my feet.

She said it. The thing I had always known but never wanted to hear. She finally said the words that there was no coming back from.

Like a maniac, a laugh escaped my lips. It surprised even me. But it was all I could do to stop the anger from continually rising within me.

“You don’t gotta worry about me ever speaking to you again Sienna. I promise you, I will never forgive you for this. I will never forgive you for blaming me for being born as if I had achoice. You don’t wanna be my mama, fine; you’re not. Fuck you.”

I turned on my heel and walked away, my vision blurry, my chest tight.

I was shoving clothes into my suitcase when Sevyn walked in.

"Tootie, don’t do this."

"Don’t do what?" I snapped. "Leave? Get away from her? Get away from someone who never wanted me in the first place?" I was loud, louder than I wanted to be with Sevyn. I wasn’t trying to take my anger out on him, but he was here and I couldn’t help it.

"It’s a family trip, Serenity!"

I laughed bitterly. "Sienna ain’t my fuckin family. Never has been or at least, she never wanted to be."

His jaw clenched, pain flickering across his face.

"Just… don’t leave like this," he pleaded.

I shook my head. "I have to. Please, just go. I want to be alone."

He sighed heavily before walking to the door and closing it. Before anyone else could come in, I locked it.

Forcibly, I threw more stuff into my suitcase before giving up in frustration. Tears fell rapidly down my face. I hated her, hated her so fucking much that it hurt.

Placing my hand over my heart, I tried to will away the heartache and pain that only my mother could cause me. Curling up in the plush king-sized bed, i tried hard to keep the wails from escaping my lips.