Page 79 of Barely Breathing

“No.” A faint smile curls the side of his lip. “What I feel for you is not how a brother feels about his sister.”

I wrinkle my nose. “I’m going to pretend that’s romantic and say I’m very glad to hear it.”

He traces my lower lip. The gentle touch sendsshivers through me. “I can’t lose you too.” The words come out rough, almost broken. “Not to Elizabeth, not to the ritual, not to my own mistakes.”

“Then trust me,” I whisper against his fingers. “Let me make my own choices.”

“Can you forgive me someday?” His other hand slides into my hair, cradling my head. The firelight plays across his features, softening them. All calculation and painstaking control fades into raw need and vulnerability.

“I already have.” I find I mean it. With what we’re facing, being angry about the past hardly seems worth it.

When he kisses me, it’s different than before. I feel the soft intensity vibrating through me. His lips move slowly like he’s attempting to extinguish centuries of loneliness. I want to give him comfort and take care of him.

I lean closer, my hands untucking his shirt until I discover bare skin. I let my fingers travel around his waist. He feels warm against my palms, and his deepening kiss makes me forget everything for an exquisite moment. Desire floods me, weakening my knees. He holds me against him.

Why can’t we exist only in this moment?

“Tamara.” My name sounds like a plea. His hands journey down my sides, sparking trails of pleasure in their wake. I want to be closer to him,feel his skin against me. He’s so still compared to my heavy breathing. It gives the illusion of calm, but I feel the hard beat of his racing heart.

Reality fights its way back into my brain. Draakmar is restless and wants to force his will to the surface. I ignore the dragon. Instead, I pull Costin closer, my fingers digging into his flesh. My vampire needs me. I feel the hole in him crammed with eternal guilt and damnation.

We’re surrounded by the sanctuary of the library’s candlelight. The world can’t touch us, or at least it feels that way. Tomorrow brings the blood moon. It ticks closer with each second. I can’t do anything about that right now. But in these few precious minutes before that raging storm, I need to forget everything but basking in the safety of Costin’s arms.

Costin needs to know I trust him after what he shared, and I want to show him. I take the amulet off and set it on the table. Crimson hunger floods his gaze at the offer. His mouth claims mine again before trailing down my neck. His lips discover my racing pulse. I’m completely exposed. Without the barrier between us, every sensation is heightened. His fangs scrape lightly over my feverish skin, and I tense in anticipation of the white heat of his bite. His lips explore, promising and teasing, as his tongue licks long trails. He doesn’t bite, but the thrill ofknowing he might at any moment sets my nerves on edge. I shudder in response.

His strong hands glide under my shirt, long fingers splaying across my back. There’s an excitement in knowing how powerful he is and how easily he can overtake me.

“I don’t want boundaries between us,” he whispers against my throat, the tickle of his breath brushes against me like a feather making me shiver.

I lift my arms. He takes the invitation and pulls my shirt off me in one fluid motion. The air caresses my skin. Electricity hums through me in the form of desire. I love the supernatural grace in which he moves, the flex of his perfect muscles beneath tight skin. I feel like we’re dancing to a song only we can hear.

His hands slide down my arms to cup my breasts through my bra. Thumbs brush over the sensitive peaks until I can’t suppress the moan of approval. The lace disappears as quickly as my shirt, only to be instantly replaced by his mouth. He pulls my nipple into a deep kiss, taking his time as if he’s trying to savor my taste.

The air feels cool against my heated skin, raising goosebumps for his hands to chase away. He takes his time and caresses me slowly as if memorizing my form, learning every curve and hollow of my body.

All those moments doubting how I feel seemfoolish now in light of what might be the end. My clock is finally running out. I survived my childhood, Conrad, the labyrinth, and an apocalyptic prophecy featuring an ancient and powerful dragon. By all rights, any of those should have killed me. How much luck can one mortal woman have? I’m afraid I’m fresh out of second chances.

The need is too great. I want him to end my torment. I try to unfasten his shirt buttons, but my hands shake. The anxious thoughts racing in my head might be suppressed, but they won’t go away completely. I focus on my body’s growing needs, trying to stay in this moment and push out everything else. The ache in my stomach unfurls, radiating from my sex like tentacles to overtake every tingling nerve ending.

Costin helps me undress him, shrugging out of the expensive fabric to reveal perfect skin. His fingers are completely healed from the fire. Golden light caresses him in ways I want to. His body jolts beneath my touch. I take my time exploring him as he did me. I trace the muscles of his chest, following the definition down to his waistband. A low growl escapes him when I brush past his arousal, the sound more monster than human.

As if by an unspoken understanding, we take our time. I feel the barely contained vampire beneath his skin, full of need and hunger. His fangs are fullyextended. And yet he doesn’t attack. I see him struggling for control.

“Are you sure?” His voice is rough with need, and his eyes fill with blood as he stares at my neck. I know what he wants. He’s always trying to protect me, even from himself.

Instead of answering with words, I pull him into another kiss. This time when his fangs graze my lip, I press forward purposefully letting him taste my blood. It flavors our kiss. Some of his control breaks. He moans deeply as his body shudders against mine, and I feel him licking the wound.

The unmistakable lift of his arousal through the smooth material presses hard against my hip. I need more. I need to end the torment raging inside me. I fumble with his pants until his hands join mine to help. An eternity passes before I’m able to take his length in my palm. The air between us is thick with anticipation. I find it hard to catch my breath.

“Tamara.” My name almost sounds like a curse in his gravelly voice. His hands free me of my jeans and I kick off my shoes so I can step out of them. He finds my hips, fingers digging into my ass as he lifts me easily off the floor. My legs wrap around his waist, feeling his muscles straining beautifully against my inner thighs.

`I feel connected to him. There is an invisible thread sewn between us that can never be severed.

He places me on the surface of the oak table. I instantly lean back to give him access to my body. My arm slides into something and I hear the ancient book fall to the floor with a heavy thump. I jump at the sudden sound, but he doesn’t seem worried about the book.

“Leave it,” he says when I turn my head to check.

He continues exploring my length, using the new angle to run his hands down my legs. He massages and caresses a sure path. The amulet bumps against my hand, but I don’t want to wear it. I like the danger of being at his mercy.

---