Page 67 of Christmas Home

I smiled and thanked him. “We’d love to come,” I said and glanced over at Clyde.

I’d managed to face the biggest demon in my life, and I was able to do it here because of the support around me. Not the least of which was my best friend and business partner, but also my connection to Clyde and the rest of the town.

It was a small miracle.

fifty-two

Clyde

That night, after touringhis childhood home, Ruther showed me his scarred body. He stripped down to his underwear, telling me he wanted me to see it all. “It’s as good as it can ever get. No more surgeries,” he’d said, and I could tell he was nervous.

I ran my fingers over the scarred skin, including across his chest. “You’re beautiful to me, Ruther. These represent a battle you’ve had to fight since you were a kid.”

I brought his hand up to the middle of my own bare chest and pressed it there. “My wounds are on the inside, but you’ve seen them just as I’ve seen yours, and you’ve loved me in spite of them. Can’t you see that’s the same? Internal or external, our scars make us who we are, show what we’ve survived. They’re a part of you, but they don’t define you.”

That night, as we made love for the first time, the stars in my life collided and made the world tilt on its axis. My life feltright for probably the first time ever, and it was only because I’d finally and fully opened myself up to the love of another man.

“I love you,” I whispered as Ruther lay with his head resting comfortably on my chest.

“I love you too,” he murmured before we both fell into a blissful, happy sleep.

fifty-three

Epilogue – Ruther

Afull year hadpassed since the night I’d finally found the courage to tour my ancestral home.

Now, the meeting house, barn, and my new home were just about finished as we once again moved into the holiday season. All had turned out exactly as planned, and on budget, which was a feat all its own. I loved the re-creation, and my extended Quaker family had even agreed to visit the following spring to dedicate the meeting house and honor the Quaker history in this area.

I’d already decided I wanted to move into my new house with the man I’d only grown to love more fiercely than I ever thought possible. Clyde was my light. A piece of me I didn’t know was missing until we found each other.

From the outside, we couldn’t appear to be more different—my New England roots and his Southern ones—but we genuinely fit together like a glove. I couldn’t wait to start my life with him,and if the past year was any indication, it would be an amazing life.

Ten homes were under construction in the community, and all had contracts on them. There was a waiting list a mile long for when we could get the other homes done. Cliff and Randy weren’t the fastest builders, even with Todd’s and Amos’s help, but they were beyond thorough, and I knew the homes would stand the test of time.

Because of my family’s history here in this part of the country, I appreciated knowing we were leaving something here that would last the course of time.

I’d spent way more than I should’ve on new Christmas decorations for the community, and no, I didn’t use our revenues from the city. Like the meeting house and barn, I felt they should come from me.

Since the fire had occurred on Christmas, I’d long associated the holiday with my own personal hell. All that changed last year, when I spent my first Christmas here in town with Cliff. Now, promoting the holiday, contrary to my parents’ commitment to ignore it, felt healing by bringing happiness instead of ugliness and shame.

But the main reason I purchased the new decorations myself was because it brought my guy so much joy. I’d told Clyde my idea about it all during the summer, on the anniversary of the first day we met. I didn’t know if he’d picked up on that, and honestly, it didn’t matter. The timing was more for me than him.

One of the things I liked about the Quakers is they believed every day was holy. Every day was worth celebrating. That’s how I felt about my days in Crawford City and with Clyde.

Funny enough, it turns out my boyfriend’s a full-on Christmas nut. He loved helping me shop for the replacement decorations. I thought he’d go for the garish multicolored lights but instead,he selected all-white decorations that formed Christmas-themed designs.

“I want them to accent the town, show off all its sides,” he’d said when I questioned him. “Crawford City is colorful enough that it doesn’t need all that to make it special.”

I agreed. It was colorful enough without garish decoration, especially the ugly stuff we put up last year.

I then put together my proposal and presented it to the town council. It was a fifty-fifty split about getting rid of the old decorations, but the mayor intervened. “The old decorations are a fire hazard, and I’m guessing they won’t be making bulbs for them much longer. Not to mention the fact that they cost a fortune to use. The lights Mr. Crawford is proposing to donate are all LED, meaning it’ll cost about a quarter of the electric bill we usually pay.”

That seemed to sway the council enough to pass my proposal.

Afterward, Emanual pulled me aside and asked if we could make some sort of winter wonderland with the old lights so the town could say goodbye properly in the new park we’d donated to the community.

“That sounds like a great send-off. Why don’t we ask Clyde to head that up?”

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