Page 43 of Liberating Love

Jameson puts a calming hand on their shoulders as Drix relaxes behind them now that he’s not the target of his boyfriend’s ire. “Aiden,” Jameson says softly. “Do you still not get it? You’re one of us.”

“You’re like a brother and best friend”—Holds waves a hand between me and Aiden—“and uh, whatever, I guess, all rolled up into one.”

Jameson nods his head. “You’re family.” His gaze lands on me and his lips tip up a tad.

Drix steps up on the side of his boyfriend. “Family.” Gav throws his elbow to the side striking his boyfriend teasingly in the stomach, but then leans into him.

Aiden’s eyes are round with amazement. My sweet, sweet man. He still doesn’t get how important he is to all of us. I kiss the top of his head and turn back to my sons, all five of them. “How about you guys head on home tonight, and we’ll reconvene this conversation this weekend? We can do Sunday brunch or dinner or whatever you have planned this weekend. Aiden and I will be coming together from now on, if that’s alright with you,” I say, glancing over at Aiden. He bobs his head once, but shifts his gaze to the floor uncomfortably. I chuckle. “You all need rest.” My eyes fall pointedly on Jovany.

Jovany claps his hands together, the sound loud in the once again otherwise silent room. “You’re right, Dad. Knowing that Aiden’s covered, I’ll be able to sleep now.”

Echoes of, “True, same, yeah,” come from the other men.

Jameson steps haltingly to the couch and reaches out a hand to Aiden for a shake. Once Aiden’s hand is in his, my son yanks him up off the couch into a bear hug. I see his lips move next to Aiden’s ear, but I can’t hear what he says. One by one, they all take turns hugging my lover, and then me, goodnight.

Jovany whispers, “Take care of him, Dad,” while clapping me on the back. I give him an extra-tight squeeze; Aiden wasn’t the only one I really wanted to get a visual of for myself tonight.

As they shuffle toward the door after the goodbyes, Aiden calls out, “Hey, Gavin.” Gavin turns his head and looks over his shoulder. “Don’t go too hard on, Drix. Kay? He was a really good friend to me when I was kinda falling apart about all…” He tilts his head to the side toward me.

Gavin rolls his eyes. “Yeah, yeah.” Drix still appears a little scared standing at his boyfriend’s side, but Gav winks at Aiden before grabbing Drix’s hand and tugging him out the door.

Once they’re gone, I say, “Well, I guess we handled that.”

Aiden lays a hand on my thigh, “Did you really mean it? What you said to them? What you said to me earlier?”

“With my whole heart.”

Aiden’s eyes well with tears. “They were worried about me. I’ve never once even invited them over; in fact, I made sure they didn’t feel welcome, and yet, they came and checked on me.”

“That’s because you’re loved, baby. You’re the only one who doesn’t see it.”

A tear slips down his face, then another until the cry I was waiting for earlier happens. I wrap him in my arms as gut-wrenching sobs pour out him, sounding as if they’re being ripped from the inner-depths of his soul. For the second time tonight, I pick him up into my arms, but this time I take him to bed.

16

Aiden

When Delaney sits on the bed with me in his lap, embarrassment starts to sneak in, but I can’t seem to stop crying. “I’m sorry… I…” I bury my face in his chest, seeking his warmth, embarrassment be damned.

“Shh. You have nothing to apologize for, baby.”

I gulp in air, trying to calm, and sniff a few times before I attempt to speak again. “There was so much blood,” I whisper. “I-I pulled him down, but he was hit before I could… I was too late.” I grip Delaney’s shirt and he rubs my back. “Jovany called it in, and… and I tried to stop the bleeding, but I-I couldn’t… I couldn’t…” Another sob escapes. “H-he bled out… he bled out before the EMTs got there.”

“I’m sorry,” he whispers and kisses the top of my head.

“I couldn’t stop the bleeding… I couldn’t stop it… there was so much blood.”

“Shhh. I know.” He tightens his arms around me and rocks me a little.

“He died, and I couldn’t help him.” Another sob escapes my chest, and I’m crying so hard, I can’t get any more words out. All I can picture is that kid staring up at me in pain and fear with blood pouring out everywhere. God, there was so much blood. That poor kid had been so scared. A man died beside me today, and I’d never felt so helpless in my life. “His name was Reid Torske… he was only twenty-two.”

Delaney holds me tight and keeps whispering reassurances, but I can hardly hear him over my own crying. After a few minutes, he slides me into the bed and starts to stand up, but I cling to his neck, not letting him move away.

He grabs my wrists and says, “I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart. I just need to take my jeans off.”

I nod, swallow, and force myself to release him. The moment I let go, a new kind of panic overtakes me and I feel like I can’t breathe, but Delaney’s back within a few seconds, pulling me into his arms again. The panic begins to fade in the safety of his arms and the fact that I’m not alone tonight.

He kisses my forehead and wraps me up tight, muttering, “I’m right here, Freckles. I’m not going anywhere.”

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