Page 28 of Ship of Fools

Francine nods, looking totally bewildered. I blush awkwardly. Again.

“Francine, we just need to see our lovely Bea, because it’s Christmas. You understand,” he says softly.

“Visiting hours are 3 – 5 p.m. today, and then 7 – 9 p.m.,” Francine says, nodding apologetically.

“But it’s our first nephew.” Andreas pleads, “...and Luca and I missed the birth. We will be very discreet.”

“We would normally only allow the father, as Miss Germano is still on the labour ward.”

“I could be the father.” Andreas winks.

The gasp out of my mouth is too loud, and my mum laughs hysterically, grabbing my arm. She’s no doubt in sleep-deprived hysterics too.

“Yes, yes, yes,” Mum laughs. “You are the father.” She snorts. Howls. Wipes tears out of her eyes. “I need to go to bed. I can’t pull these all-nighters anymore. Shall I just get one of those Uber things?”

“No way.” Andreas is clearly the one in charge here. “It’s Christmas Day and no Uber driver in their right mind will be working. We’ll take you home, just as long as I get to see my new son. Please, Francine. We will be very discreet. It’s Christmas.”

Francine looks half shell-shocked, half sputtering out held-back laughter. “You guys are... insane.” She giggles.

“No, I promise you, we are perfectly sane.” Andreas reassures her.

“Just hang on a second, and I will ring through to the ward. I’llask. No promises.” Francine says, trying to compose herself as another nurse appears behind her.

I don’t know how he does it, but a few minutes later, Mum has a cup of tea and is playing candy crush on Andreas’ phone, because her own phone has run out of battery and nobody has a charger. Apparently. And, Andreas and I are being led through the corridors towards a locked door screamingLabour Ward.No visitors. No unauthorised personnel. IDs must be displayed at all times.

We shouldn’t be here, but Andreas is happily whistling away, clutching my hand, as I’m squeezing the life out of his fingers.

“Are you the father? I’m so sorry you missed the birth.” A friendly looking nurse asks, as the door mysteriously falls open, letting us into the ward.It’s surprisingly quiet, and she whispers, ‘’Congratulations,” as we are whisked through another door, where my baby sister is curled up on the bed.

I don’t think I have any more tears to burst into, yet I let out a little sob. Because I’m me and she’s my little sister, and again, I feel so overwhelmed that I don’t know what to do. I have no idea what to say. Instead, I stand there. Staring. Like I always seem to do.

“I’m never doing that again.” Bea says from the bed, as she reaches her hand out for me to come and give her the clumsiest hug known to man. I don’t know where I can touch her, drip wires attached to her arm, and a scary looking cannula stuck in her hand.

“Was it bad?” I stutter out, as she laughs.

“It was worse than hell. Anyone doing that more than once needs to be committed to a straitjacket. Seriously, Luc, it was awful. But look! Baby! I have a baby!” She’s probably still off her head on painkillers, and I hope there are all kinds of goodies in that drip, looking at her sleep-deprived state, and obvious pain as she tries to sit up.

“Hand him to me, will you?” She begs. “I need another cuddle.”

“I’m Andreas.” Andreas says from behind me. I had almost forgotten he was there, which makes me feel even more of a fool.

“Are you alright in there, honey?”

That’s the nurse, again. Smiling at Andreas who is expertly lifting the baby out of the cot on the side. I hadn’t even looked at it, the baby. What kind of human am I? One that can’t behave like a human at all, as Andreas smiles like all his Christmases have come, at once.

“Congratulations, Daddy,” the nurse says, and Andreas squeals, and Bea bursts out laughing as the nurse looks pained.

“I’m not really the Daddy,” Andreas says, looking apologetic.

“I thought so.” The nurse laughs. “Mummy, are you alright with these two in here?”

“The big oaf is my brother. The pretty oaf is his boyfriend. It’s all good.” Bea laughs. “Stop hogging my baby, and come here.” She demands of Andreas, who obeys her order, with a nod. Because Bea is the queen bee here. She always is.

“It’s nice to finally meet you.” Andreas says, placing the baby in Bea’s arms.

The baby is tiny,but so very obviously one of us. He’s got the Germano nose, and tiny little lips pursed into a smirk, before launching into a full-blown yawn.

“He’s beautiful,” Andreas sighs. “Well done you.”

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