Page 45 of Sweet Poison

But that’s just like me, isn’t it?

I ruin everything I touch.

Everything I love.

Chapter

Fourteen

NO CHRISTMAS SPIRIT? NO PROBLEM

Willow

“The one I’ve been missing.” — W

Ibreathe in the comforting scent of damp earth and the sweet tang of orchids as I navigate the dense Amazonian foliage. My boots sink slightly into the rich, dark soil with every step I take deeper into the forest. I push aside a curtain of long green leaves. “This is what life is all about…” I whisper so only I can hear. The forest feels alive, almost breathing, like a living entity that pulses with its own rhythm. Each footfall seems to echo with the whispers of ancient trees and the distant murmur of unseen creatures.

Excitement bubbles inside me as I take everything around me. God, got beautiful. I wish more people would look at nature with the same eyes I do. Maybe that way we could out look after together and prevent it’s ruined but humans are so thoughtless and at times so selfish. We take from her what we want but almost never give back as good as we take.

Something lands on my nose making me stop. Looking down I spot a cute little ladybug crawling on my nose tip. I laugh as I reach up and slowly help her onto my finger. “Hi, cutie.” I whisper and watch her little self-move up my index finger. “Oh, no worries. I won’t keep you. I’ll set you free.” I bend down and wait for her to climb off my finger down to a leaf. “Off you, go. Love bug.”

I take out my phone from my pocket and take a photo of the lady bug before pocketing the phone once again. Rising to my full height, I move around taking in the scene before me. Warm sunlight filters through the trees above, scattering in a kaleidoscope of gold and green. I’ve always been most comfortable surrounded by green. And this place feels as if I'm walking through a fairy land or a dreamscape. Another realm where reality has faded and magic weaves through the air and the leaves.

The forest looks like a painting of vivid colors— blues and yellows of exotic flowers, the bright orange of a distant bird flying between the branches, and the ever-present green of the towering trees. This forest is home for so many wonderful creatures. I find myself constantly stopping to take the breathtaking beauty around me.

I wonder what my parents would think if they were here experiencing this magical place with me. Mom would feel the same way I do as if this forest was home away from home and dad well… he would put on a smile for us but deep down he would rather be anywhere because he’s not a nature kind of guy but he loves his girls and so he tries.

With a full heart, I keep on walking until my heart quickens with excitement as I spot a cluster of unusual mushrooms growing at the base of an old tree. On closer inspection, I notice their caps shimmer with an iridescent glow, hinting at the rarity of their existence. The delicate, almost translucent edges of theirgills make me catch my breath. My loving mushroom heart beats wildly with every step I take towards them. Once I’m close enough, I crouch down, careful not to step on any and feel the softness of the moss under my knees, and pull out my camera and notepad to document this find.

Found you…

Lingzhi mushrooms.

“Hello friends,” I whisper softly to the unusual and cute mushrooms. Here, when it’s just me and these creatures I use my voice without fear of being ridiculed or attacked. “I’m here to help. Promise.” With practiced care, I take samples and notes, my hands steady despite the thrill that surges through me. Each second I spend in this magical forest feels precious, a fleeting encounter with a world on the brink of disappearing. When I’m done with the samples, I rise and keep searching for more rare mushrooms.

I pass flowers that I know their names by heart because I grew up caring for them in my mother’s gardens and greenhouse. While I love fungi, my mother has a special love in her heart for every plant in existence, even the ones most people disregard because they’re not as pretty as other blooms… cactuses.

Lost in my head, I stumble upon something that makes my heart leap with joy: a perfect circle of amanita mushrooms. My favorite. I take in their brilliant red caps dotted with white specks that sets them apart from the rest. The sight is so enchanting that it feels like I've discovered a hidden treasure. My breath catches in my throat, and a wide, involuntary smile spreads across my face.

“I was hoping to find you guys too!” The mushrooms form an almost otherworldly ring, their vibrant colors standing out starkly against the dark, rich earth. I kneel beside them, my fingers gently brushing the soft moss that surrounds their base.Each mushroom seems to pulse with its own inner light. I take a few photos of them and then write my findings.

While I finish dotting down my notes, I sense a shift in the atmosphere, something that wasn’t there before. I look up from the mushrooms, and there he is—Madden, standing a few feet away, his face set in a grim expression. Thud. Thud. Thud. My foolish heart starts to beat rapidly as if the man before me could hear it.

Don’t be silly, heart… he’s not for you. He never was.

His black eyes are fixed on me while he hovers like a dark shadow. I freeze, my hand hovering over my notebook.

After a long moment of silence, he finally speaks. “What is it about those damn things that make you so happy?” His voice is low and rough, as if he's speaking to himself rather than me.

Use your voice, Willow. I can hear you just fine. The words had hurt especially with the look on his face when he said it. He looked bored as if he was annoyed by me.

It took me back to the times I was made to feel ashamed because of my disability but then I remember how Madden has never been unkind to me. Never once. Even when life had been so cruel to him.

Feeling a bit nervous, I look away from his intimidating eyes, and glance back at the mushrooms, their bright red caps still glowing softly against the dark soil, and then back at Madden. His black brows are pulled low and his expression is hard to read. As always…

I draw a steadying breath before I do what he asked before. I use my voice. “M-mushrooms are rare,” I whisper while signing the words. “These ones are almost extinct. So, I smile and I’m happy because finding these babies feels like holding a treasure that’s slowly disappearing from the world.”

Madden’s empty gaze flickers between me and the mushrooms, his frown deepening. “Yeah…” he signs at the sametime he whispers. “What else?” He surprises me by kneeling next to me on the moist ground ruining his very expensive gym clothes. It seems almost comical such a large man dripping in expensive all black sports attire dirtying himself and asking questions about mushrooms. It’s odd. The man with me now doesn’t seem like the playboy millionaire driver that the media paints him as but the curious and jaded boy who used to sneak into my mother’s greenhouse at night.

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