Page 65 of Bleeding Hearts

Seems I’ve been ambushed, not that I care.

“I’ll make sure they get home before dark.” Just as I’m about to leave, I snap my fingers. “Does Kellie have her EpiPen? I don’t think we’ll need it, but just in case.”

“I doubt it. There’s a spare in?—”

“The top drawer of the kitchen. I know.” I returned the one I’d kept at my house because seeing it in my drawer was too hard. When I handed it to Nolan, any hope he’d been wearing on his handsome face disappeared as he snagged it from my hand and slammed the door in my face.

As I was leaving, I intended to ask Cora if she’d like me to fix her a plate, in case she starts feeling better, but she’s already out and snoring. I should’ve asked her how long she’s been feeling sick, since it seems she’s lost a little weight. But then I remember what Rylee said. People who go through tough breakups often experience bouts of depression. The diminished urge to eat can contribute to weight loss. It would also account for her paler complexion and extreme tiredness.

On the other hand, there’s an alternative explanation for those symptoms. I doubt she’s thought about it. I know I hadn’t when I was in the same boat. That’s why I’m going to keep a close eye on her. If there’s no improvement in the next couple of weeks, I’ll speak with her.

As I’m walking out the front door, my parents’ rental car pulls up to the curb and parks. My father’s voice carries through the air as he opens his car door, and he expresses his wish to make this quick so he can get back to the ranch.

They have no idea I’m here, which has to be why my stepmother says what she does next.

“Is it the ranch you want to get back to or the new farrier you hired?” The frown on her face says she’s not stupid.

“Don’t,” my father warns as he closes his door. “That’s not your concern.”

Right before she says anything else, my stepmother spots me and pastes on a fake smile, giving me a wave. “Beth, sorry we’re late. Your father had business he needed to take care of this morning.”

She’s perfected that over the years. Just like my mother had before she died. It’s something I remember, even though I was only four when complications in childbirth stole her away from me. Being in a marriage with Jimmy Rogan meant accepting his preference for variety and his lack of effort to hide it. I’m not sure why Tammy allows him to run around on her. I always thought she wore blinders, refused to acknowledge what the rest of us already knew. Seems I was wrong.

This just reinforces my decision to stay away from committed relationships. I’d rather live my life alone than with a man who shared his bed and expected me to accept it. Nope.

I’m happy for Alicia. She’s snagged one of the few good ones. Dillon, however, has been warned that if I even think he’s fucking around, I’ll tell her and it’s likely he’ll become a missing person. Not kidding. I’d do it. I was close to doing it with her ex, Adam.

Now it’s my turn to fake the charm and play along with my parents.

“Dinner will be ready soon,” I tell them as I cross the street. “We have two more joining us. My neighbor’s daughters. His sister, who watches them, is sick, and he’s working.”

“Oh.” My stepmother pulls me into a hug. “That was nice of you to invite them.”

My father looks down at his watch and frowns. “We need to leave in an hour. I’m not fighting the traffic to Atlanta later.”

And that’s how the next hour continues. My father constantly reminding us how he needs to go because they have a six a.m. flight and he wants to make it to Atlanta before it turns dark. While my stepmother complains about the food and how she was hoping I’d have made something besides turkey since they’re having that tomorrow.

Alicia, Micheal, and I are used to this, but Dillon looks shell-shocked. I can see he wants to say something but bites his tongue. Welcome to the family, brother-in-law. This is our norm, and it’s why we’re all sowell adjusted.

Mollie, my savior, paying no attention to the grumpy old people, took the seat beside me, ready to update me on her adventures since Halloween. I’m not sure how many times she said, “This turkey food is the best.” All I know is that each time she said it, my heart pounded harder in my chest while the little voice in my head kept repeating,if only you were stronger, you could make her turkey food every year.

Which is why as soon as dinner is over and my parents run out the front door, I excuse myself to my bedroom and hide in my bathroom and cry. I’m not stronger and hate that I’m choosing to remain miserable and alone, all because I’m a stubborn bitch who’s scared to want more.

Chapter 31

Nolan

Ihate Christmas lights. They are from the pits of hell and only created to make miserable fuckers like me waste hours outside untangling them before we spend even more hanging them. I should’ve just left them up this summer, but my stupid ass had to put my nose into business that wasn’t mine. So here I am, standing in front of public enemy number one’s home, putting them back up because my baby girl reminded me I promised I would.

“Whoever invented these damn things needs to spend eternity untangling them,” I grumble as I toss a huge, tangled ball of them onto the ground. “Fuck this.”

But then I look up and see Mollie sitting in my driveway with her chalk and know I can’t disappoint her. So, I stomp across the street while I pull my keys from my pocket. “Hop in. We’re going to the store to buy new lights. Those are a mess and a fire hazard.”

My baby girl climbs in through my door and over the console to the back where her booster is. “Can we buy the big snowman blow up thing?”

“We’ll see.”

An hour and twenty minutes later, I’m backing my truck into Bethany’s driveway so I can unload the crap my daughter talked me into. Call me a grumpy sucker, because that is exactly what I am.

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