Page 31 of Silver Secrets

“I can handle it, Sloane. It fucking gutted me to see you so scared in the woods last week, but all I was thinking in that moment was that I wanted to help you.”

“What if I never get better? We’re here today?—”

“On our date.”

She shook her head, but there was no argument behind it. There was something about the way Gage was pursuing her that felt warm and welcomed after so many years of forcing herself to be alone. “I don’t want to lead you on. There might never be a time when we’re able to go beyond you touching me only if it’s somehow medically necessary. And even then it might still be really hard for me to deal with.”

“How about we don’t put so much pressure on it right out of the gate? Because we can sit here all day and worry about the what ifs. Or, we can start out with something you are comfortable with and go from there.”

“I don’t know.”

“We can start small. Can we just try holding hands?”

“You’d… you’d be okay with that?”

“Christ, Sloane. Yeah. I’d be more than fine with that.”

Gage held out his hand, his face turning to look at something off in the distance. She knew he was trying to not make her feel any pressure. God, why did he have to be so sweet? So patient? He made it so easy to want to get better. Because something in the back of her mind already had her heart skipping at the thought of curling up against his side and snuggling down onto his chest.

That thought bolstered her. There was no room for fear. She’d let the issue go on for far too long. She’d let it grow into a dragon that now needed slaying. And it looked like her knight in shining armor was going to be the one to help her do it.

Sloane brought her sub down, laying it back on the parchment paper before wiping the crumbs from her fingers onto her jeans. She willed her hands not to tremble as she reached out to take his hand, melting into the way his warmth immediately radiated into her body.

When his head turned back towards her and his gaze dropped to their connected hands, she couldn’t hold in her nervous laughter any longer.

“The idea of holding my hand is really that funny, Red?”

“No. It was more the thought that once again I’m forced to get help from my knight in shining armor, and here you are, more than ready to slay a dragon for me.”

“Knight in shining armor, huh? I like the sound of that.” He squeezed his fingers. “How is this? Are you doing okay?”

“If I don’t think about it too hard, it’s really nice. There’s only one downside.”

“What?”

“How are we supposed to finish our lunches now that our hands are occupied?”

“I’ve got a perfectly good hand right here.” Gage reached into the bag next to his hip and pulled out a chip. “Open up.”

Her mind felt like it was short circuiting, but she obeyed his command.

“Relax, Red.” His hand squeezed down on hers. “The only part of us that is going to touch is our hands, okay? I just want you to be able to finish your lunch, too.”

“I trust you.”

Nine

“Ireally appreciate you coming all the way out here, Sloane. And so late in the day. It means a lot to me that you were so flexible this week.”

“It’s no problem, Chloe.” Sloane shoved back the anxiety bubbling in her stomach as she looked out her client’s front window at the fading daylight. Darkness was not her friend. She needed to get going. “You know, just one of the exciting parts of living in a small community and having rural clients. So, are you okay with going back to our regular time next week?”

“Absolutely.”

“Good. I’ll put you on my schedule for then. Remember, keep doing those kind things for yourself and prioritize small moments where you can practice those mindfulness breaks we talked about this week.”

Sloane said goodbye to her client and made her way out to her car. Home visits were not a regular part of her practice, but for housebound clients, she was more than happy to make the effort to meet face to face where they were comfortable. Especially in a rural area where internet connection issues didn’t always make telehealth visits possible. And it felt good to know that her services were truly available to anyone in the community who might need them. She just needed to remember not to schedule appointments so close to dusk.

Trying to distract herself, she let her mind wander to all the things she needed to take care of before she could call it a night. Although the appointment had been on the later side that evening, she’d still had a few hours of administrative tasks ahead. But even that long list of tasks couldn’t keep her mind from wandering to Gage for very long.

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