Page 99 of Mafia and Gold Digger

“More tea?” The small voice pulls me back into the room. How Emerald has managed to look after three young siblings until now, I’m not sure, but if I’ve learned anything about her, it’s that she’s persistent and resilient. Once she puts her mind to something, she does it. Whether it’s a good idea or not.

I stare at my nearly full cup, dwarfed in my much larger hand. It’s comical how seriously Giulietta’s taking this tea party, but I’m doing my best to play along and not to ruin it. When I started to care about impressing a five-year-old, I’m not quite sure, but here we are.

Deep down, I can see how it happened, but I’m not going to acknowledgethatin the slightest. Giving it my attention means it might be real. And maybe, just maybe, I want it to be that, but I’m not sure where I stand with Emerald. And setting myself up for failure isn’t in my DNA, so the thought gets pushed into the back of my mind.

“No, I’m good.” I pause, looking at how Giulietta’s eyebrow arches in a way that mirrors Emerald. “But, um, thank you.”

She nods, satisfied with my display of manners, and my lip curls into a small smile.

“So…” I drawl the single word, taking another tentative small sip—I don’t have the heart to tell her she didn’t mix the packet long enough.

“So?” she asks in her piping voice.

“Who do we have here?” I tilt my head toward our honored guests.

Meticulously arranged along the table are a menagerie of bears, big and small, who crowd the space all around the small toy table. Thank God that the bears aren’t honey-colored…

When we began, Giulietta set them out with care, patting their heads and ensuring their cups were filled with the proper amount of ‘tea’ before giving each a small plastic plate. My heart clenched in my chest a little.

It’s the small things like this that keep catching me off guard. Between Giulietta and Jaspar, some part of me I was sure died a long time ago stutters like it’s trying to rise from the grave. A faint beating pulse trying to resurrect. Buried so deep down inside me, I didn’t even know it was there.

It’s a fruitless endeavor, and yet, that tightness in my chest grows every time my gaze sweeps over the kids. From the coloring, to the board games and now the tea party, that broken and barely alive part of me stirs to life more and more. Aching in some foreign way that causes a lump in my throat that I swallow thickly.

Giulietta gasps slightly.

And my eyes dart to her. Is she hurt? Did she do something? My eyes assess the situation. I pride myself on always being ten, fifteen steps ahead of everyone, but this one little girl has me doubting my skills.

“How rude of me!” she exclaims.

I blink and relax my tensed muscles.Dramatic little thing.And I can’t help the soft laugh that rumbles through my chest. That warmth spreads, and this time, I don’t shove it away, don’t let the ice crawl back over it.

“I didn’t introduce you to our guests.”

“No, you didn’t.”

“I’m so sorry, good sir.”

My small smirk turns into a proper smile before I stop it. “All’s forgiven.”

She beams at me, and once more, that thud of my heart thumps in my chest, the uncomfortableness fading slightly with each minute that ticks by.

“They’re a family,” she says in a determined voice as she pats the first bear’s head. “This is Milena Bear. This is Jaspar Bear.”

Jaspar’s head lifts from where he’s doing a puzzle on the floor, and his small nose scrunches. “I wanna be a crocodile!” Obviously, he’s decided to join in now.

She swivels to face him and gives him what I assume to be the signature Fiorelli glare that Emerald’s shown me a good few times, before she turns back in her seat to face me.

“This is Giulietta Bear,” she continues as if her brother didn’t say a word. I nod and smile, and she eats up the attention before moving on. “This is Mommy Emerald Bear. And this is Daddy Saint Bear.”

And my world stops.

I’m not breathing.

I don’t blink.

Is this what cardiac arrest feels like?

The air in my lungs is sucker-punched from me, and I nearly tip back from the force of it.

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