Page 28 of Scarred Heart

I knew where I wanted to be.

I was barely outside when I placed the call to my pilot.“Last minute flight,” I explained as I waited for the car.Another Bentley.When I found what I liked, I stuck with it.“I’m on my way to the hangar now.”I paid him enough to be ready at a moment's notice, and he didn’t sound surprised at the sudden announcement.

While flying back to Beverly Hills, I did a little research.Rather, I let Bruce do it for me, calling him once I was in the air.“I need you to find an address.It’s in the valley.The name is McNulty.”He called me back not fifteen minutes later with an address for a Mr.and Mrs.Charles McNulty, who had apparently lived there for more than three decades.I could hardly imagine living in the same place that long, but I was glad they had.It made this much easier.

Within the hour, I was on the ground, behind the wheel, after having my car brought to the hangar in advance.With the address in my phone’s GPS, I drove to the valley for the first time in as long as I could remember.It was barely past nine by the time I arrived, turning down their street and noticing how quiet it was.Peaceful.That was good.I wanted her to live someplace peaceful.Her mother had grown up here, and she had turned out pretty well, in spite of my interference.

The house in question was as modest as I had imagined.It couldn’t have held more than three bedrooms on two floors and featured a small front and side yard, which I could observe once I parked a few houses down and across the street.A chain-link fence ran in front of it, but that was the only utilitarian feature.Somebody had painted the exterior a shade of yellow that was probably cheerful in the daytime, while the shutters were bright green.There were flowers in the front yard, plus potted plants on the porch.A pair of high-backed wicker chairs were out there, along with a swing big enough for two.There was a book sitting on the swing, and I wondered if my kid left it there.

I couldn’t believe how much I wanted to go up there and find out which book it was—the smallest way to be connected to her.

I knew so many men my age, in my line of work, or at least wealthy and not looking to share that wealth with anybody.They would have shit their pants on the spot if they found out they had a kid.If the kid’s mother told them not to bother trying to be involved, they would’ve gladly taken them up on it.It would have been like winning the lottery.

Not me.I didn’t know that about myself until now.It was the sort of thing a person couldn’t predict about himself, how he would react if the situation were more than hypothetical.

Somewhere in the little house, my daughter was living and breathing.Part of me existed outside my body.How could I not want to be part of her life?

How was I supposed to deal with her mother wanting nothing less?

My thoughts wandered as I drove away.A car like this would be spotted before long—minivans and late model sedans were more the speed around here.But I would be back.

Nothing would have kept me away.

10

ROWAN

When I was a kid, there was nothing better than Friday afternoon.School was out for the weekend, and there were two full days of freedom to look forward to.I had sort of lost that feeling as an adult, working my ass off seven days a week.Having Hannah with me on the weekends had brought the feeling back, leaving me feeling lighter and happier as we left Mom and Dad’s the Friday after the close call with the intruder.

“Can we do something this weekend?”she asked with hope in her voice.

“Depends on what you had in mind.”I carried Hannah’s backpack by one strap while she carried a tote bag full of books, which Rhiannon had bought for her during a shopping spree at the local bookstore.

I hated to think how much she had spent, but I figured it had something to do with cheering Hannah up after last Saturday.Something to pick up her spirits, though she had seemed happy enough when we were together on Sunday after the door was fixed and Spencer had left.

Spencer who hadn’t bothered reaching out since then.It shouldn’t have come as a surprise.

“I don’t know,” she said, shrugging.“Anything.Maybe to a movie or something?”

Considering I would’ve asked to go to Disneyland when I was her age, I knew I was getting off easyeven if ticket prices were a little ridiculous.“Sure, is there something you wanted to see?”

She opened the front gate and waited for me to pass before closing and locking it.Mom waved from the front door.She was a little concerned after the attempted break-in, but I had spared no expense with my new alarm system.Any breach resulted in a call going straight to the local police station.I also made sure the front desk staff was aware that they had let somebody upstairs without confirming an order had been placed.They were supposed to do that.The property manager made sure to tell me the girl working the desk that night would be dealt with.Considering she could’ve gotten my daughter hurt or killed with her laziness, I couldn’t bring myself to feel sorry.

Blissfully unaware of my thoughts, Hannah shook her head, making the golden curtain hanging past her shoulders shimmer in the last beams of early evening light.“No, but there’s probably something that wouldn’t be too grown-up or whatever.”

“I’ll look into it.”I stroked that golden hair, wrapping an arm around her and giving her a squeeze on the way to my car, parked a few houses down from my parents’.

“You don’t have a date this weekend?”she asked, and I looked down, catching the sly look she gave me.

“Is that what this is about, young lady?No, I do not,” I told her, sticking out my tongue.“So there.”

It was a good thing she couldn’t hear the way my heart sank.No, I wouldn’t have a date, and there was absolutely no reason for any sadness because of that.Spencer and I had slept together once.Well, technically twice, but both in the span of a few hours.He had told me Sunday morning that he had a busy week ahead of him.

I had no right or reason to expect anything more than that.He didn’t need to call, text, or send an email.If anything, his silence might have been preferable to contact.He could have sent that scary lawyer after me, demanding a paternity test or forcing me to sign something saying I would never go after him for child support.When I thought of it that way, it was better that he faded into the background again.

So what if this felt way too much like history repeating itself?This time, he knew what he was missing out on.Nobody was lying to him, concealing the truth.He was making this decision on his own.

“It’ll be just you and me this weekend, kid.”And that was just fine.It was what I was used to.I opened the passenger door for her, and she loaded her books in the back seat after climbing in.Which meant she didn’t see what I did.If she had, she wouldn’t have known what she was looking at, anyway.

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