Page 38 of Got to be You

I’m singing for everything that I gave up to make this dream come true, I’m singing for the guys I achieved it with, I’m singing for the fact that I did explore my dream even if it didn’t work out how I wanted it to in the end, and I’m singing for everyone who supported me as I did. Mostly the fans. There are fans here today who might not know what is coming, but they’re supporting us until the bitter end anyway.

I give myself, mind, body, and soul, to the music and for a moment, it reminds me of what I’ve always loved about music. Why I gave so much of my life to it and why I’ve continued to write songs in my notebooks even knowing that they won’t see the light of day. Because it’s my passion.

But my passion can be lived out in a different way, can’t it? It doesn’t have to be like this. Music can be explored in many different avenues without so many negative side effects. I just need to find a way to suit me. One where I can have my own life at the same time, because I need that now. It’s more important to me than I ever thought possible, and even if all of my plans don’t work out, I still need to be me.

The song eventually comes to an end and there is a strange heaviness floating between the guys and me as it does. It’s done now, over, there is no turning back. We have played our last song.

“We will just go to commercial,” the runner tells us hurriedly. “Then we will do the interview.”

That means we need to head over to the couches where we will sit with the host of the show and finally present our announcement. So much zig-zags between us all, there are nerves and excitement coming at us from every angle, and I don’t know how much more I can handle. But soon, soon, we will be free.

I glance at Spike and Harry, spotting the same determination but anxiety in them as well, and I offer them a reassuring smile. As long as we’re supportive of each other, we can survive it all.

We take our seats. The host sits opposite us. A thick tension floods the room. We’re just waiting until the commercial break is over, until the cameras are switched on, and then it’s go time…

“So, boys,” the host begins, snapping into professional but friendly mode. “I’m not going to beat around the bush here because I knoweveryoneis on the edge of their seats, waiting for the announcement.”

I suck in a breath and look at the other guys. Harry is biting on his bottom lip, Spike looks oddly like a deer caught in headlights, so I guess that means it’s up to me.

“Well, we’re here today to tell you that this was the lastLionHeartperformance.” Groans of disappointment burst around the room. I have to wait until they calm down a bit. “I know this isn’t going to be what anyone wants to hear, but we have had a great three years, we have enjoyed playing and having our fans, but we need to go different ways in our lives now, and this feels like the best time to do it.”

“Oh… wow.” I’ve even managed to shock the host. “I wasn’t expecting that. It feels sudden.”

“I suppose it does to everyone else,” I agree. “Because we’re at the height of our fame. But this is something that we have been thinking about for a very long time. It’s the right step for us.”

“I see, and what are your plans going forward? Are any of you going to go solo?”

The host looks at me first, because I suppose I’m the obvious choice in that department, but I direct the attention to Harry, who jumps on the chance to discuss the sort of music that he wants to play next when given the chance. He even plays a bit and does some singing, which impresses everyone, including me. If we had known that he was this good, then he could have sung more with me.

Then it’s Spike’s turn. I’m shocked at how honest he is. I wasn’t expecting that. But I suppose it’s good, really, because it shows the fans that everything hasn’t been smooth sailing and that there is also a danger to chasing a Hollywood dream. A lot ofdangers, actually. If only I had known, it might have changed things.

Although probably not. I was very determined, wasn’t I? I don’t think anything could have stopped me.

“Well, at least you’re ending on a high, music wise,” the host says, shocked. “And Jax, what about you?”

A smile spreads across my face. “Well, my first plan is to spend time with the woman I love.”

“Isn’t she in Egypt at the moment?” the host asks. “Filming her new movie? Is that where you’re headed?”

It takes me a couple of moments to work out what she’s talking about, but as soon as it hits me, I burst out laughing. “Oh, no, those are just rumors. They always have been. I’ve only met her briefly a couple of times. I don’t even know her. No, I’m not dating any actress. The woman I love is more of a college sweetheart from my past. Not someone who is in Hollywood at all. No one famous.”

“Oh, wow, so you’re giving up all the fame, Jax? Headed for a simple life? Can youbea regular person?”

I shrug my shoulders. “I don’t know what the extended future holds. I only know what I want to do next.”

The conversation continues around me, but I don’t have anything else to contribute. Nothing at all, actually. I’ve said my part. What needs to be said is out there now, so I can sit back and enjoy the rest of the interview. I have no idea whether Lilly will be watching this. Of course, I hope so, but I can’t be sure. But if she has been, then surely, she must be ready for me. She’ll know this is our time at last.

Our time.Now that is something that I never thought I would see the day of. I didn’t know it was possible. But it’s here at long last. If it doesn’t work out between Lilly and me now, then we can safely assume that we just weren’t meant to be. But I don’t believe that. I think life has always pulled me back to her for a reason. Because we’re destiny. And now, I can be the man she deserves.

I know what’s important, what to focus on, what to put my energies toward to make me happy. I suppose not many people can say that, especially at twenty-five years of age, but I’ve lived more than enough in those few short years. What I want now is a quiet life, a calm, drama-free life, with the one person who has always made me happy. If I do manage to get Lilly back, then I’ll never let her go again. Ever.

No, this is our time now, and I need to make the best of every single day because if Lilly takes me back, then I’ll officially be the luckiest man on the planet.

28

LILLY

“College sweetheart,” I mutter to myself as I pace up and down the room, just like I’ve been doing for hours now, ever since I saw the shockingLionHeartbroadcast. “College sweetheart, no one from Hollywood… I mean, that has to be me, doesn’t it? Even Anna said so. There was no one else.”

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