Page 26 of Her Bully Alpha

His shoulders relaxed slightly. "An ex. We haven't dated for a couple of years."

But that didn't mean he wasn't physical with someone else instead.

"Did you lie in the car?"

He shook his head. "No, I wasn't seeing anyone."

"Were you physical with anyone?" I asked before I took another sip of the water.

He raised an eyebrow at me. "Were you?"

I nearly choked on the water and shook my head. "No."

"Not even late nights with your little friend from the office?"

I sighed. "Jesus, Joshua is just a coworker. I have not, nor would I have done anything with him."

Jay's eyes narrowed slightly. "You're lying."

Okay. I was lying about the last part. If given the chance, I would have loved to date him. Joshua was sweet and caring. But I wouldn't have done anything while still working at the firm. And not when I was married.

"If I wasn't working at the firm and met him in a different way, I might have dated him. But that's not how it goes." I set the glass down.

"Then why did you run? You got her to go away, and then you retreated from me."

I shrugged. "Why does it matter, Jay?"

He gripped the counter, his expression softening. "Because I care about you, Sam. And if something is bothering you, I want you to tell me rather than bottle it up."

I scuff and roll my eyes. "That's not true, and you know it."

"It is," his voice dropped low in a warning, but I ignored it.

"If that were true, Jay. You would have treated me better before. You wouldn't have rejected me. You wouldn't have cared that I was, as everyone says, just a human."

It physically hurt to admit the words. I knew my worth, and yet, looking at him, I felt like less. All those years building myself up seemed for nothing. I was back here trying once more to prove I was worth something.

Jay walked closer, and I tried to retreat, but he was quicker. He pinned me between the wall and the counter, not letting me leave. His body pressed against mine, and he grabbed my chin, yanking my face up. I stared at him, and his eyes looked filled with frustration and regret.

"I am not that same person anymore, Sammy. I would think after living with me this long, you would see that."

I inhaled his scent and felt my heart skip a beat at it. Jesus, he smelt amazing. And with his body pressed against me like this, I could feel how muscular he was in his chest as his arms. And his hands were surprisingly soft. They were gentle as they held my chin.

And his eyes were so honest. I could see he meant every word he said, but my mind didn't want to believe it. Because if that were true, I was holding onto pain in the past. Holding onto a person that was no longer around.

Jay had been different. As grumpy as he was in the morning, he always set the coffee maker for me. He at least said good morning when he saw me, even if he was in the middle of something.

He was respectful and gave me space. Even when he took me to events, he always looked at me, seeming to account for my feelings. He cared.

His face grew closer. "So, I ask again, what's wrong?"

I swallowed, feeling cornered. I couldn't tell him. It was unfair. If I admitted just how badly I wanted him, how badly I wanted the attention, he wouldn't understand. He had been respectful, but this was something else.

"Nothing," I whisper.

He leaned closer, "Bullshit."

My breath hitched, and my eyes glanced at his lips. It was just for a moment, but when I looked back up to his eyes, they were looking at my lips.

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