Page 64 of Beautiful Dreamer

“Why are you grinning like that?” Jill asked. “What’s going on inthat head of yours?”

She banished the smile from her face. “I was just ruminating onthe fact that you let Charlie stay the night on a non-Thursday.”That’s right. Toss it right backto her.

“So I did.”

Devyn shifted to sincerity because there was something differentabout Jill this morning. She seemed lighter and heavier at the same time. Maybeshe was more serious about Charlie than even Devyn realized. “Do you love him, Jill?”

Her sister took a moment with the question before slowly nodding.She shifted her lips to the side and stared at Devyn, seeming unsure of what todo or say. Yep. She loved him, but it scared her. That much was clear.

“It’s a good thing, you know. Falling in love. I’m happy for you.”

Jill sighed. “Thank you, but love’s not all sunshine and rainbows.I’ve tried it before, remember? You were my maid of honor. Didn’t work, and Iwas left to pick up the pieces.”

“Frankie was an ass from the start. You just decided to ignorehalf his personality because he was good looking. Is Charlie an ass?”

“I give him a hard time, but no. He’s a really good person, Dev.He treats me like I’m somebody special even though I’m just me.”

“Stop that,” Devyn said, with maybe more force than she intended.“You’re probably the nicest, most deserving person I’ve ever met, but youalways sacrifice your happiness for everyone who is not you. You’ve got to stoptaking the smallest proverbial slice of pizza for yourself. You deserve the bigpizza, okay? If Charlie gets how awesome you are, and you happen to think he’sawesome right back, then I say throw Thursdays the hell out the window and behappy every damn day of the week.”

Jill nodded. “You know, I’m warming up to the idea.” She pursedher lips together and seemed to make a decision to share more. “I can’t believeI’m telling anyone this, but last night was the first time he’s slept over.”

Devyn made a point to remain casual so as not to frighten this newopen and honest version of Jill. “And how was it? Having him here.”

Jill scrunched her shoulders together in an adorable show. “Iliked it. And he was so attentive and careful with me because of my injuries,you know? Offered to get everything for me. Do all the cleaning up afterdinner.”

Devyn tapped her coffee cup. “His stock is rising in my book.”

They drank their tea and coffee and watched the neighborhood wakeup slowly. An orange cat ran up a nearby tree. The across-the-street neighborput out his trash can and waved. She had to admit, the slow pace was incrediblysoothing. In fact, she couldn’t remember feeling this relaxed in…well, ever.Her mind drifted to the events of last night. The hot shower scene was one thatwas burned into her brain and body for all time. But more prominent wassomething Jill had just touched on herself. Waking up wrapped around Elizabethwas the nicest of discoveries. Her warmth, her sweet cotton scent, and themanner in which she held Devyn close resonated. She shook her head at thefullness of her heart. She was apparently in some sort of weird mood to letsomething that mundane affect her. The back of her neck prickled as shedistantly considered that maybe it wasn’t so mundane after all. Maybe this wasa big deal.

“Have you ever been in love, Dev?”

She studied Jill and grappled with how to sidestep the personalquestion, but then realized that Jill had opened up to her. She should trydoing the same. She met her sister’s friendly brown eyes. “No.”

Jill continued rocking. “You’re like me. You don’t let people ineasily. My walls went up after my divorce, but you know something? Your wallshave always been up. Why do you think that is?”

Devyn let a little time pass before tackling the question,deciding it was easier to just dodge it altogether. “Probably because I’mmarried to my career. In fact, I should be on the phone right now, selling myass off. Shaking my international contact list and seeing what falls out.” Shestood, more than a little uncomfortable with the direction of the conversation.She didn’t do well in the spotlight.

Jill nodded sagely but didn’t comment right away. Instead, shewatched Devyn walk to the front door. “You hide behind it, you know? Yourcareer.”

Devyn scoffed, her hand on the doorknob. “I do not. It happens tobe what makes me happy in life.”

“That’s what you tell yourself so you can justify not having toget too close to anyone. If you live a fast enough paced life, you won’t noticewhat’s missing.” She tapped her temple. “You forget how well I know you.”

“It’s not like that.” It was a lame argument, but it was all Devynhad.

“Let her in, Devyn. You might just be surprised.”

“Who are we talking about?” she asked, knowing full well anddodging the acknowledgment. She let herself into the house and spent the rest ofthe day making calls abroad and organizing a brokers’ open the likes of whichthe city of Philadelphia had never seen. Emotional vulnerability was the bestmotivation.

When she finished her to-do list for the day, she sat back at herdesk with two fingers of whiskey, watching the trees sway through the window asdusk fell. Jill’s words still rattled around in her head, annoying and loud.She was afraid to let anyone in? She’d never quite considered that and wonderednow about the accuracy of the statement, fearing its validity. She’d alwaysblamed her passion for her job for her lack of any real, close-knit personalrelationships. She was too busy to get wrapped up in another person. Shequestioned the logic now.

Because shecouldmake time for someone important. Sheshouldmake time for that person. So why didn’t she?

Devyn took a slow pull from her glass, pondering. Maybe Jill wasright, and maybe it was time to take down some of her walls. Wouldn’t be sohard if she just put her mind to it.

But if that was true, why did the idea scare the living hell outof her?

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