Hadley tried to smile, but with Autumn’s comforting arms aroundher, it never quite manifested. What was it about someone being nice to her inthe middle of a difficult time that just unleashed the emotion in one bigwhoosh? “I’m just having a rough couple of days. I think Spencer’s afraid ofcommitment, and that may never change no matter how strong my feelings grow forher. I was a wreck about it and then you guys blew me off last night when Ineeded someone, and the world just felt very, very big. I felt small.” Sheshrugged, not sure how else to categorize it.
The three of them exchanged glances and seemed to sink lower intheir chairs. Isabel turned to Hadley soberly. “That was fucked up of me. Noworkday is more important than you.”
“Thanks, Izzy.” Hadley sniffled. The words helped.
“Same. You would have dropped everything for any one of us,” Giasaid. “On a dime.”
Hadley nodded her appreciation.
Autumn stared at them sadly. “I fell asleep,” she said, as if itwere the most horrific of admissions. “Kate watched the kids, and I just passedout and missed the text entirely. I’m an awful friend,” she said in horror.
It was Hadley’s turn to put her arms around Autumn. “You are not.Do you hear me? You are an exhausted friend.” Still holding Autumn, she glancedacross the table at Isabel and Gia. “Just hearing you care is enough for me,okay? Everyone is forgiven automatically.”
“Shouldn’t we at least get more of a lecture?” Isabel asked. “Idon’t feel properly punished.”
“Yeah,” Gia said. “Call us a few names.”
Isabel nodded. “Slam your fist on the table. Take awayMs. Pac-Man.”
“Malign our families.”
Hadley winced. “That seems extreme. I don’t want to do any ofthat.”
Autumn sat up, regaining her composure. “Well, at the very least,tell us about the trouble with Spencer. Let us weigh in and help.”
“I can do that.” Hadley obliged and recounted the events of theprior morning. Hearing it all played back made her feel slightly ill andembarrassed all over again. “Did I overreact?”
“Your emotions are yours, which makes them valid,” Isabel said.
“That sounds like code for I’m a crazy person.”
“You’re not crazy,” Autumn said. “You were completely in the rightto feel slighted. You’re someone who places a high value on your relationships,and it makes perfect sense that you’d want the same back from someone you werefalling for. Youarefalling for her, aren’t you?”
“You wouldn’t be crying if you weren’t,” Isabel pointed out.
Hadley blinked back the returning tears. “I am. I feel ithappening more and more with each moment we spend together. We’re so different,but that’s what has me so enraptured.”
“Then don’t you dare discount what’s happening,” Gia said,speaking with an intensity Hadley was not used to. “You always shove your ownfeelings aside for everyone else’s. You go out of your way to do nice thingsfor others and to make the world a better place. You take the burnt piece oftoast or the bad seat just to ensure others are happy. Do not compromise.”
Isabel nodded. “You’re deserving of so much, Had.”
“Is she falling foryou?”Autumn asked gently.
Hadley asked herself the question honestly. “I think she is. Ialso think the concept terrifies her. For example, she seems to do much betterwhen we stay at my place. She relaxes, but when I come too far into hers, thewalls go up. I dropped by out of the blue one afternoon when she was working,and you’d have thought I’d stolen her cat.” Hadley shook her head. “You shouldhave seen how out of sorts she looked. She always recovers. But it’s there.”
Her friends exchanged a concerned look, which only validated herworry.
“I felt like I had intruded, which is how I felt yesterdaymorning, too. I don’t want to intrude on anyone’s life. I want to share in it.”She sighed. “Why in the world did I think falling in love would be amazing?”
“It can be,” Gia said. “You just have to sort out the issuesfirst.”
“Does Spencer know how you feel about her?” Autumn asked. “Thatyou’re falling in love with her?”
Hadley shook her head. “We haven’t discussed love. I don’t wanther bolting on me.”
“Bolting or not, maybe it’s time to show your cards,” Autumn said,and squeezed her hand. “Then Spencer knows exactly what she’s responding to.”
Isabel slowly raised her hand.