Page 65 of Love Like This

Spencer reached for her wrist and stopped her progress. “Stop it.I don’t want you to pack it all up. I just needed a minute to adjust and Ihave. I’m all good now. See?” She pointed at the forced smile on her face.Didn’t matter. The damage was done. Spencer’s reaction had pretty much slashedher to bits, but in the spirit of harmony, Hadley propelled herself beyond it.She was capable of rising to any occasion and this one was no different.

“Yeah, I see.” It was all she had in her. “No big deal.”

“We’re fine,” Spencer said, kissing her cheek.

“Yep. Fine,” Hadley said back. “French toast should be ready in ten.”

“Thank God. I can’t wait.”

But the damage was done. They never did regain their easy give andtake, and when it was time to head out for work, Hadley did something she neverever did. She lied. “Hey, about that dinner tonight? I just remembered, I promisedIsabel we could get together. It slipped my mind entirely. Can we raincheck?”

“Oh. Okay, cool. Then we’ll do it another night this week.”

“Great. I’ll call you or—”

“You can call me.”

“Perfect.”

“Yeah.” A pause. “Hey, have a good day at work.” Spencer kissedher lightly on the mouth and searched her eyes as if trying to ascertain theircurrent status, which is the opposite of what Hadley wanted. She didn’t needSpencer to feel sorry for her or go out of her way to make Hadley feelcomfortable. She was a big girl and would take care of herself. Always had.

When she reached her car, she fumbled blindly for her phone.Anybody free tonight for a chat?she typed into her friends’ four-way group text. It was her own version ofmayday, and she hopedher friends would be there for her. It wasn’t until later that day when Isabeltexted back that she’d be working late, and Gia apologized but had a date nightplanned with Elle, and Autumn didn’t respond at all that Hadley burst intotears alone in her office, wondering how she’d gotten herself and her heart sofar entrenched, feeling things for someone who may never be able to reciprocatethe way she wanted her to. Not only that, but she felt very alone in the world,with no one to confide in.

“Had, you okay?” Daisy asked, peering at her around the corner.

“Oh, yeah.” She straightened automatically and pretended to leandown for something in her bottom drawer, wiping her eyes as she went. “It’sjust that my allergies have been unbearable lately, you know. Fall is brutalwhen it creeps in.”

Daisy reached for a tissue and carried it over to Hadley. “Hereyou go. For the allergies.”

“Thanks, Daisy.”

“Hey, I know you’re my boss, but you’re honestly the best bossI’ve ever had. If there’s anything on your mind, or if there’s anything I cando to make your day better, just say the word, okay?”

The kindness generated a small light in the center of Hadley’schest that spread out slowly. She’d needed that. “Thanks, Daze. I’m okay,really. Now even better.”

Daisy nodded. “Good. We’re all closed up and set for the night.I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“You most certainly will.” She stood and gathered her belongings.“I plan to have fewer allergies.” She slung her arm around Daisy and theywalked out together to greet dusk in LA. This time of day, Rodeo was a littleslower, with cars headed home and shops closing for the day. Some people wouldreturn to their families and start dinner. Others would head out to meet fordrinks or a date. Hadley headed home quietly alone. She hadn’t heard fromSpencer all day, which was rare for them. Maybe she was every bit as off-kilteras Hadley was. Maybe she was reconsidering everything. Who really knew?

With her spirits low, Hadley quietly got out of her work clothesand slipped into yoga pants and her old threadbare Dodgers sweatshirt. She atein silence at her kitchen table and then slipped off to bed early, feeling morelonesome than she could ever remember. She let her thoughts turn to Spencer asshe drifted off, her smile, her dry wit, and her kind heart. She was everythingHadley wanted, and apparently, exactly what Hadley couldn’t have.

She’d have to learn to reconcile that. Settle for less or runscreaming for the hills. The weight of her eyelids and the stress of the daywhisked her away from all of it. At least temporarily.

Chapter Eleven

The rainy October morning seemed fitting. Hadley had woken to atext message from Spencer that said simplyGoodmorning, Beautiful. Those words should have left her glowing, and ina small way, they managed to put a smile on her face. But she was concerned andnot feeling at all like herself. She shuffled her way to Pajamas in her yogapants and sweatshirt, not needing to dress for work for a couple of hours. Sheaccepted her mocha gratefully from Autumn, who’d returned to work three days aweek, juggling the kids between her schedule and Kate’s until a nanny startedthe following month. But Hadley was just going through the motions.

“Why isn’t Had saying anything?” Isabel asked Autumn, from acrossthe table. “Have you noticed that Had has stopped speaking?”

“I haven’t,” Hadley said simply. But she couldn’t look them in theeye. Emotion circled and bubbled and reared its relentless head. There would beno tears. None at all. But she lost the battle the moment the thought occurredto her, and became a big blubbering mess.

“Oh no, sweetie,” Autumn said, coming around the table. “What’sgoing on? Why are you sad?”

She waved Autumn off as the tears pooled and fell, hot andplentiful. “I’m just being stupid and extra emotional.” She swallowed the lumpin her throat. “Maybe I’m on a PMS kick. Ignore me. Put a plant in front of meor something. Go back to whatever you were talking about.”

“We were talking about strangers dancing in their cars when theythink no one is looking,” Gia pointed out. “I think we can press pause.”

“I don’t like it when you cry,” Isabel said. Her face was pulledin and she seemed alarmed. “Tell us what’s going on. Autumn, make her tell us,so we can make it stop.”

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