Page 55 of Hearts Like Hers

It was the only way.

For now, she pulled Autumn closer and refusedto watch the clock as their time together ticked away, one important moment ata time.

* * *

Kate stood in the courtyard several dayslater, phone to her ear, shaking her head at what she was hearing. The bag ofgroceries she’d purchased sat abandoned on the pavement for the more importantphone call. She’d been waiting on Jennifer from the DHS to get back to her, andat long last she had. The news wasn’t good.

“We have a foster home lined up for both Renand Eva for a month. It’s temporary, yes, but it’s the best I could do.”

“They need a permanent situation,” Kate said,agitated at the thought of the kids, suitcases in hand, moving from one home toanother because the adults involved couldn’t do any better for them.Unacceptable.

Jennifer sighed. “We’re on the same pagehere, Lieutenant. It’s just not easy, especially if we want to keep the siblingstogether.”

“Well, we do. We definitely do. Anything newfrom their mother?” She decided not to mention her own unsuccessful field tripto Santa Barbara. She was pretty sure that wouldn’t go over well.

“She’s stopped taking my calls,” Jennifersaid. “I checked her out, and she’s been on the straight and narrow for a whilenow. Honestly, I think she’s overwhelmed by the prospect and running scared. Iwas hoping with time she’d come around, but that doesn’t seem to be the case.The last time we talked she pretty much told me to go to hell.”

Kate stared at the pavement, processing. “So,that makes the kids adoptable, right? If she’s essentially giving up herrights?”

A pause. “Why? Are you offering?”

“No.” Panic struck. “I didn’t mean me. I justmeant…someone.”

“We can move to have her rights terminated.Once that happens, both children would be adoptable should the right personcome along.”

“Yeah, well, the sooner the better. And, hey,Jennifer? I appreciate you keeping me in the loop. I know this isn’t exactlyprotocol. It’s probably the opposite, but I appreciate the favor.”

“As far as protocol goes, this isn’t anaverage case.”

“No, I guess not.”

They wrapped up the call, leaving Katefeeling like they were no closer to any sort of resolution. The guilt settledheavy and uncomfortable on her heart.

“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop,” Isabel said,turning in her spot on the outdoor couch.

How had Kate missed her sitting there?

“Sounds like you’re dealing with some prettybig stuff.”

Kate nodded soberly and stared at her phone.“A couple of kids I know lost their father in a fire.”

“One you worked?”

She looked up. Isabel’s eyes held startlingsympathy, but not in the pitiful way everyone had looked at her back home. Katenodded, and for reasons beyond her, it all came tumbling out. “It’s weighing onme like nothing I’ve ever experienced. It’s like I can’t get out from underthat day. I think about it and play it back at all hours.” She placed her handacross her chest, realizing that, even in that moment, she was finding it hardto breathe.

Isabel nodded. “Wanna sit down?”

Because Kate didn’t know what else to do withherself, she did.

Isabel watched her and seemed to settle on adecision. “Here’s the deal. I don’t talk about this much, but I live with somepretty major anxiety. Panic attacks, whatever you want to call them. They canbe crippling.” She held out a hand. “And if you’d rather not talk about it, Iunderstand. Just tell me to shut the fuck up.”

“It’s fine.” Kate nodded. “I have troublesleeping sometimes. The fire, all of it, replays in my head.”

“Been there.”

She decided to take advantage of thisopportunity. “How do you get it to stop?”

Isabel raised her eyebrows and sighed. “Yeah,that part’s harder. Talking about it helps. I see someone once a month. It tookme a while to bite the bullet and just do it, but it was the right thing. Mytherapist seems to think I’ve made progress, and the attacks hit less andless.”

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