Page 24 of Never To Forever

“Hey.”

“Hey, man,” Christian greets. “It’s time for your afternoon check-in to make sure you aren’t being stupid. How’s it going? How are you feeling?”

“Good,” I assure him. I feel like I’ve been saying that a lot lately. It’s my go to response to that question. I could talk about the occasional twinges my shoulder gets, or the ache in my ribs when I twist a certain way too quickly, but most people who ask me how I am don’t really want those details. They want assurances that I'm good, so that’s what I tell them.

Christian isn’t everyone, so I know I could go into more detail with him, but I have a gut feeling that he’s not actually calling me to check in on my recovery. I’ve been keeping him updated on how I’m doing, so there’s something else he wants to talk about.

“Glad to hear it,” he says.

“Is that what you’re really calling about?”

Christian chuckles. “Can’t get anything past you, can I?”

“Nope,” I assured him with a grin. “I’m too smart for that.”

He lets out a long sigh. “Here’s the deal. I’ve been tasked with reconnaissance. Haven knows you haven’t been going to the library the last week, and she wants to know why, but she’s convinced if she’s the one to ask you, you won’t give her a straight answer. So, she’s having me reach out and ask because she thinks you’ll tell me the truth. Of course, I wasn’t supposed to tell you all that, so keep that our little secret, yeah?”

“Ooooh, snitch.” I let out a bark of laughter. “What does she suspect?”

“That you and Marie had an argument and you’re avoiding her now.”

Damn… Haven is way too perceptive for her own good. Marie probably talked to her—those two tell each other everything. Did she tell Haven about the kiss? I can only imagine the crazy ideas filling my sister’s head right now.

“Nothing happened,” I tell him. “I just have been taking up enough of her time at her job, so I thought I’d give her a break.”

Christian snorts. “Right, okay. If that’s the story you want to go with.”

“Look, it just wasn’t working for me to study at the library anymore,” I say. It’s not a lie; I’m just omitting the details of why it wasn’t working anymore. “It’s more convenient to do it on my own at home.”

Christian lets out a skeptical humming sound. “It’s really none of my business where you study and why, but I just want to make sure you’re not making things more difficult for yourself because you’re being stubborn.”

The man knows me well.

“You tell Haven I’m fine,” I reply. “She doesn’t need to worry about me.”

“Hmmm, all right, I’ll tell her that. I can’t guarantee she’ll believe it, so she’ll probably grill you later herself.”

I shake my head and sigh. “Haven needs to just chill and focus on herself and the baby.”

“Preaching to the choir, brother. You know you can tell me if there’s anything wrong, right? You don’t have to be all brave and tough for my sake.”

“I know, man. Don’t worry. If anything were really wrong, I’d tell you.”

He sighs. “Okay. I’ll give Haven an update, and hopefully, she’ll let it go for now.”

I doubt that, especially if Marie is upset about how things are between us.

“Thanks,” I say. “I’ll talk to you later.”

We end the call, and I let out a long breath. This is getting too damn complicated. I need to figure out what to do about Marie. She’s got me so torn up inside and wish I could talk to Mom. Get some advice and some guidance. Rubbing a hand across my chest, I feel an ache, as if my heart is twisting with my guilt and confusion.

Thinking of Mom makes me want to visit her. Maybe going to her grave and just being near her will help me clear my head. It sounds a little silly, but the thought fills me with a sudden yearning. I haven’t been to her grave since the funeral. It’s been in the back of my mind to do so, but I just haven’t done it yet. It could make me feel better, at the very least.

With that decided, I clean up my notebooks and close my laptop, then go into my room to change my clothes. I’m not about to visit Mom in worn out sweatpants and a faded old t-shirt. Putting on jeans and a button-up, I check my reflection in my bathroom to make sure my hair isn’t a mess, wanting to look my best for Mom.

When I’m ready, I grab my keys and head out to my truck. My heart is hammering, and I feel a strange burst of anxiety as I drive to the cemetery. I’m weirdly nervous about this, but I tell myself there’s nothing to be nervous about.

I pass the flower shop downtown and the thought strikes me that I should take a bouquet with me. Pulling into a parking spot outside of the stop, I hop out and make my way inside. A few minutes later, I leave the shop with a bundle of brightly colored daffodils and daisies. They’re cheery and pretty, just like Mom.

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