Page 42 of Age of Shade

When Lindsey left, that was just… it. We were done, and it was time to move on. Or, in my case, despise myself for not being able to make something work that wasn’t right to begin with. There were no drunken, pleading voicemails, or angry, emotional talks. After six years together, we didn’t even say goodbye. I expected her to reach out, if only to have the last word, but it never happened. As the months have passed, I stopped expecting her to.

Today, with fresh memories of my beautiful girlfriend writhing on top of me, tits bouncing as she rides me into oblivion… well. Needless to say, there isn’t another woman on my mind. Why would I be dwelling on the past when my future is here and it’s more than I ever knew to hope for? Adina won’t be in until late tonight, which gives me time to make—or at least make a passable attempt at—dinner and plan my next greatobjective: getting her to move in with me. There are only a few more months left of her final semester at school. She’ll be taking her first steps into her future, and there isn’t a doubt in my mind that I want to be by her side.

Now, I just need to convince her.

At last, when the day finally drags to a close, I’m just at the point of gathering my things when there’s a short knock. June, my receptionist, pokes her head in, looking apprehensive.

I still, staring at her in some alarm. “Everything okay?”

June makes a face. “Yeah, we’re good. Everyone’s heading out. But, um,Lindseyis here to see you. I said I’d have to check if you were still here. Want me to get rid of her?“ It couldn’t be clearer by the way she says my ex-girlfriend’s name that she doesn’t approve.

Lindsey is here?

Swallowing back my shock, I shake my head. “No. Have her wait. I’ll be right there.”

With one last disapprovinghumph, June vanishes. I stand stock-still, staring blankly at the back of the door. It’s been seven months, and I can’t imagine what she’d want now. Unless…Shit. Her mom has been sick for ages. If she’s passed, if Lindsey wants me to go to the funeral, I have no idea how I’ll handle it. The woman didn’t even like me, surely she’d be perfectly fine without me standing awkwardly amidst the mourners at her funeral.

There’s no time to think about it.

I find my ex-girlfriend waiting in the empty lobby. Her hands are folded neatly in her lap, and she’s staring at the mural of dancing teeth like they’ve offended her somehow. Since I last saw her, she’s obviously undergone something of a reinvention. Her hair is lighter, her skin is tanner, and her clothes seem more trendy than what she wore when we were together. She’s still Lindsey, though, the same woman I slept beside for six years, and staring at her now… I feel nothing.

“Asher.” Her eyes narrow on me as she stands, adjusting the strap of her handbag on her shoulder.

What do I say to her? I swallow. “What are you doing here?”

Her lips flatten into a line. “Can we speak privately?” She glances around the waiting room, again with that same air of disdain. There’s nobody here—undoubtedly June left for the night after informing me of Lindsey’s arrival—but I don’t argue. Without another word, I turn back the way I came and lead the way to my office. By the time I’ve turned, leaning back against my desk, she’s closing the door behind her.

“What’s this about?”

For a moment, Lindsey just stares at me. Then, scathingly, she says, “I know.”

“Know?”

“Yes.” Her lip curls. “I’m doingfinewithout you, Asher. Great, even. I’m seeing someone, and it’s going very well. In fact, he took me to the Nona exhibit last night. Have you been?”

My stomach drops.Christ.She saw Adina and me together at the museum. I should be sorry that it’s obviously upset her, but I can’t bring myself to care. “We’ve been broken up formonths, Lindsey. You said yourself that you’re seeing someone. What does it matter if I am?”

Across the small office, Lindsey looks murderous. “Do you think I’m stupid?”

“For fuck’s sake—”

“No!” Her voice has risen now, and she steps forward, chest heaving. “You were cheating on me. That’s why you didn’t want to get married, why you were always at work. That’s why you didn’t even bother to make sure I was okay after I left. You had a hot, young replacement lined up.”

My jaw goes slack. “I met her six weeks ago. Not even, actually. This is ridiculous. Please leave.”

Lindsey’s fists curl at her sides, and she looks so furious, I think for a moment that she might actually hit me. Former relationship or not, if she takes one more step toward me, I’m calling the police. “You’re such a liar,” she snarls, and steps back toward the hall. “Put on whatever good-guy pretense you want, Asher, but I know the truth. That’s all I came here to say. I hope you and your preciousAllisonare very happy together.”

I still, gazing at her. “Why would you—what makes you think the woman I was with last night is Allison?”

Lindsey scoffs. “I told you I wasn’t stupid. Did you seriously think your girlfriend would just blindly accept you were letting some random teenager sleep in your office without getting suspicious? I saw her there one night, youasshole. I sat right outside your office and watched her go in.“ She snorts, turning to go. “Silly me. I thought you wouldn’t be interested in a trashy little street rat. Apparently, I overestimated your standards.”

Without another word, she flings open the door and storms out of sight.

My hands find the desk behind me, the wood biting into my palms as I stare unseeingly at the worn office couch across from me. The couch where Allison has curled up to sleep every night for three years.

I can’t move.

I can barely breathe.

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