Page 25 of Give Me Forever Love

“Fuck you,” I mutter under my breath.

You basically picked a club over her, man.

I run both hands through my hair, grabbing at the strands, wishing I could shut my subconscious out.

I’ve worked my whole adult life to build that business. I did all the dirty work.

Risked everything, and for what?

To sell it to Danny who’ll probably run drugs out of it.

I stand up and pace the room, wishing I could change all of this. Wishing I didn’t even have to pick.

My freedom or my club?

“You want to do this.”Bones’ words roll through my mind.

I wonder about Ben and Simon and their situation. Would they pin it all on me? I shake my head.

It is all me.

I hired them.

Simon was my main guy, my bookie. He made sure everything ran smoothly while also making sure I got my money from lowlifes. I never asked him what he did to ensure I got paid from people who tried to fuck me.

But given his past of being involved with some pretty scary motherfuckers, I’m sure what he did wasn’t clean.

He’s got to make a deal with someone. They’ll look into his past and stick him in a goddamn hole somewhere. I rub my forehead, pinching the bridge of my nose.

And Ben was involved in everything. He was by my side through it all. I never hid shit from the man.

He didn’t get hired because he was a good guy. Ben has his own demons and the feds will build off of that.

If I get out of this, they have to get off the hook, too. I’m not the only one I have to worry about here.

Am I going to do this?

Am I going to give it all up?

My blood boils and I pick up my mattress and toss it at the wall.

I grip my head and slide down the side of the white brick. Looking up at the ceiling, I ask for answers I don’t deserve.

I’m a criminal.

My mind wanders to my little brother and his girlfriend. Goddammit, Jace. Why weren’t you more careful?

I haven’t spoken to him since I got in here. I can’t help but worry about the guy; he’s unpredictable at best.

But why did he do this?

Over some pussy?

Fuck, man. He could have his pick and he chose the girl with a badge?

And now I’ve got some tough choices to make.

I know to some this should be easy, but when you come from what I did, having a place like I had….it means something.

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