Page 104 of Your Pucking Mom

She offered me a lopsided smile, the curves of her lips forming the most endearing expression I’d ever witnessed. “I think I love you,” she confessed.

I was momentarily speechless, as if a burst of color had suddenly illuminated the dreary day outside. It was as if her words had transformed into a symphony, my life unfolding like scenes from a movie, and my heart swelled with the realization that the woman I had fought so hard to be with stood before me.

“I—”

She raised her hand, swiftly cutting me off. “We need to be practical. When we return to Chicago, we must figure out how to navigate this, especially considering Austin’s my son and he means the world to me. I refuse to let our relationship jeopardize the team.”

I nodded. “Yes, I agree. My life was hockey for so long, but you’re so important to me, Auburn.” I sighed. “I was so focused on what was going to happen after I retired, what my life would look like without hockey in it. I was probably a little depressed if I was being honest. But with you here, I can’t imagine a life without you in it. You bring sunshine to the darkest of days. You offer me clarity in moments of uncertainty. I don’t simply love you, Auburn. I live within the letters that encompass that one four-letter word. I live for…you.”

Her arms wrapped around me as she dropped her head onto my chest. She inhaled deeply, and her fingers squeezed as if I was somehow going to escape.

“I’m right here,” I murmured. “I exist not only to love you, but to revolve around you, to find purpose in your presence.”

We held hands, and when we finally came to, it was downpouring, so we ran down the Royal Mile to get back to our hotel.

“One more favorite on your list,” Auburn remarked as we arrived at the hotel, both of us drenched to the bone.

“Saved the best for last.”

54

ledger

my favorite color

“I wish we didn’t have to leave tomorrow,” Auburn said as she packed some of her clothes. “This has been the best trip of my life. I mean, aside from my little breakdown earlier.”

I paused where I stood in the small hallway between the bed area and the bathroom where I was grabbing my suitcase and turned around to gauge her tone. She was smiling without a care in the world, not realizing what she had said.

I crossed the room in three strides and grabbed her wrist. Her eyes went wide. “Don’t do that.” I let go of her hand.

“Do what?”

“Don’t minimize what you went through or act as if telling me the biggest part of your life is as simple as a breakdown.”

“But—”

“No.” I shook my head. “That was a significant part of yourself that you entrusted to me. Please don’t diminish it.”

“Okay.” She nodded, her response a soft whisper as she meticulously folded her clothes, preparing to leave. Her movements were precise, methodically packing her belongings. She paused, her gaze wandering around the room. The hotel exuded old-world charm, with sleek furnishings and subtle accents. Soft-gray hues adorned the walls, complemented by elegant photographs of Edinburgh.

Soft light from the streetlamps came through the sheer curtains, giving the room a gentle glow. As she kept packing, the room felt still, with the sound of her breathing breaking the quiet.

“I’m going to take a shower,” I said from behind her, wrapping my arms around her waist and kissing her right by her ear. She turned her head and pressed her lips to mine. While she was occupied, I dropped a package into her bag.

I walked into the bathroom, turning on the shower before stepping in, hoping she would see what I had left.

55

auburn

I chuckled to myself and continued folding my clothes, though it was mostly for show. Normally, I’d be tossing everything in here without a second thought, but since Ledger brought me most of these clothes—well, Stassi picked them out—I was being a bit more careful.

I sighed, letting the smile stay plastered on my face, because this was perfect. We may not have had a plan for what would happen next, but Ledger promised when we got back to Chicago we had a couple more days of his vacation before he had to go back to practice.

I was okay because even though it had been difficult to share that part of my life, it was like I was giving him everything—every piece of me was his to hold.

I stuffed the underwear into the side pocket, then pulled out a sleek gray package. It was wrapped with a white ribbon and was the size of a shirt box. “Where the heck did you come from?” I said as I pulled the ribbon.