Page 96 of Playmaker

“What? Are my eyes all red?” My nose probably was too.

“Just want you to know that this is his loss.”

I snorted.

“No, really. You are an awesome person, and when you let someone in, you do anything for them. I’m privileged to be one of those people.”

Now my eyes were watering up again. “Darcy, don’t you dare get me crying again. Let’s get some food and you can tell me what’s up with you.”

He pulled me in for another hug and I gripped him tightly.

Whatever my life was like, I couldn’t imagine it without Darcy. And I would do anything for him.

Chapter28

Romance and hearts and feelings

Cooper

I spenttwo days with Hunter and Hailey, and it was exhausting.

Hunter was right: Hailey went nonstop. I had to leave for workouts and a couple of team meetings, and when I got back to their condo, Hailey would launch herself at me like a rocket. I’d suspect Hunter had been keeping her calm till then, but he always looked wiped out.

Then Faith got home, and Hailey only wanted her mom. Which was totally as it should be. I finally went back to my place. It was my home, and where I spent my off-ice time. I liked being at my place.

It was quiet. I should have been happy, after Hailey time, but it was too quiet.

Callie was right. Neither of us were interested in a relationship based on romantic feelings. Sure, we’d grown close. Shared things, gotten to know each other. Too well. When you added sex to that—things did get confusing. Knowing she was feeling something… I couldn’t lead her on. Maybe my ego was too big. I wasn’t used to someone telling me no. That would be why I was so unsettled, still dwelling on this.

Fuck that.I’d been told no in the past and it had hurt. But it had been a long time, and I’d never let myself get in a situation again where hearing no was going to devastate me. I didn’t want to tell Callie I was finished with her, so I should be happy she took the initiative, but this was totally messing with my head.

Fortunately, rookie camp started and I had that to keep me busy and wear me out. Guys were returning to Toronto and I needed to check in with them, see if they were ready mentally and physically for the upcoming season. After the way the last one ended, we’d done what Coach said and kept that feeling, that horrible failure feeling, and we were using it to drive us forward this season. As captain, I had to lead. Take blame for that loss and propel us into something better. And the only thing better was the Cup.

I was in good shape, as were most of the team. If you wanted to play at this level, you couldn’t slack off all summer and hope to keep up in training camp. But those first practices were brutal, and I added some extra cardio and weights, just to make sure I was at my peak. There were younger guys coming up all the time, and I was turning thirty this year. That was old in hockey years. Someday I wouldn’t be the best, but I made sure that day was as far in the future as possible.

I hung out with my teammates. Did a photo shoot for a sponsor. And at the end of every day came home to my quiet condo and thought about Callie. It was…not me.

Callie had changed me. I finally had to admit what that meant. Those damned feelings she’d talked about.

When I couldn’t take it anymore and we had a day off practice, I asked Hunter to go for a run.

We stretched, then started a slow pace to get to the waterfront pathway. It was early in the morning, and most of the few people around were doing the same as we were.

I set a fast but steady pace. Hunter trained with Faith when he could and made use of our team facility, so he was still fit. Once we were warmed up and getting into a groove, he spoke.

“What’s up, Coop?”

If I’d just wanted the exercise, we could have run on treadmills at the practice facility. Not a lot of privacy though. I’d asked to run outside for a reason.

“It’s Callie.”

“Huh,” he grunted. “I thought there was no Callie anymore.”

There wasn’t supposed to be. Anyone else, I’d been able to say goodbye and it was over. “Yeah, well my brain hasn’t gotten the message.”

This was when he could start saying he’d told me, whatever. But since he was a nicer guy than I was, he didn’t. “What’s your brain doing, then?”

I shook my head. “It keeps thinking about her. I want to tell her stuff.” I might as well say it. “I miss her.”