Page 66 of Bulletproof Love

He releases a long exhale, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, you’re right.”

I watch as he not so subtly adjusts his boner, clenching my thighs together.

Ah, fuck it.

“Hey.” He turns and I reach for his face, kissing him softly. “Let’s find this body, then maybe we can finish what we started.”

His answering smile is pure joy. “Sweetheart, I’ll dig faster than I’ve ever dug in my life.”

After a few hours of nothing, Blake calls, telling us she’s done for the night. Jasper and I exchange looks, silently asking if either of us wants to keep up the search. I won’t be the one to admit I’m also frozen and dying of hunger, but I’m not too proud to beg with my eyes.

“Tell her we’ll meet them by the car,” he says.

I know he wanted to find something. We all did. Trying to cheer him up, I force optimism into my voice. “I’ll come back with you tomorrow. This area is huge, it’ll take a few days to search it.”

“You will?”

Why does he sound so surprised? A flutter of nerves hits me out of nowhere, but I fight through the cursed feeling. I reach for his hand, entwining my fingers in his. “Of course, and maybe we can get dinner beforehand?”

Holy shit, did I just ask Jasper Shea out on a date? An actualdate,date?

He squeezes my hand, and answers, his voice so smooth it makes my freezing legs weak. “Dinner then digging up a body. How romantic.”

As we head back home, it hits me. I’ve never asked a guy out before. Hook-ups, yeah. I’ve initiated plenty of those. But this feels different, and I can’t figure out why.

We’ve already crossed so many lines together. Made each other come. Killed a man. We’ve even fallen asleep in each other’s arms, for fuck’s sake. So why does the thought of sitting across from him at a restaurant make my stomach go all berserk? Like somehow dinner is what makes this thing between us real.

I’ll have to talk to Blake and let her diagnose me with the help of her psych textbooks. But right now, with Jasper’s hungry eyes meeting mine in the car’s visor mirror, I can’t think of anything I want more than him.

CHAPTERTWENTY-SEVEN

JASPER

I repeatmy new mantra the entire way home.Don’t fucking overthink this.Falin knows how I feel about her. Finally expressing those feelings felt incredible. Incredible and terrifying all at once. Memories of that first night flash through my mind. Her more vulnerable than I’ve ever seen, telling me she’s been hurt too many times before. That she sees me as one of the good ones.

Hell, I still don’t know if I can be that for her. I’m not good… even if I’ve been trying so hard for her. I’ve never not fucked someone when the opportunity was there.

Never.

With Falin, feeling her come for me has been more than enough. I still can’t wrap my brain around that. But for the first time since Bailey was taken, maybe even the first time in my life, I feel like I deserve something good. Something real.Her.

And fuck, even if I don’t deserve her, it’s too late now.

I meant every word that I said.

She’s my new goddamn addiction.

Unless she flat out tells me to fuck right off, I’m holding on tight to whatever I can.

Do not overthink.

We stopfor some mediocre burgers, all four of us trying not to let the disappointment over our failed plans get us down. I can tell Blake’s taking it harder than all of us. She wants so badly to see the best in people, even Mischa. Life’s thrown her enough to break even the strongest person, yet she still holds onto hope.

When we reach the apartment, Blake and Damon say goodnight and head right to their room, leaving Falin and me standing there, waiting for one of us to say something.

“I—”

“Want to?”

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