Page 101 of Imperfect Desires

He stared at me for a long moment, as if trying to decide whether to throw a punch or accept it- maybe both. However, he didn’t argue again. After a few moments, he surprised me by bursting into laughter.

“Welcome to daddy duties.” He clapped me on the back before walking off.

Alina’s breathing hitches, pulling me out of my thoughts, and my hand freezes. She shifts, murmuring my name in a dry rasp. I lean in before I even consider it.

“I’m here,” I whisper.

Her eyes blink open, heavy-lidded and dazed. “I’m so hot… my throat—”

“I’ve got you,” I say instantly.

I slide an arm around her and help her sit up. Her body feels delicate against mine, warmth radiating from her skin in waves. I take the glass of water from the nightstand and bring it gently to her lips.

She sips, then pulls back, wincing. “I just… need air.”

I nod and help her to her feet, gently wrapping the soft knit blanket around her shoulders. She leans into me, and my heart soars with joy that she trusts me enough to rely on me for strength. I push open the balcony doors, allowing the night air to rush in. It’s cool, crisp, and fragrant with pine and early spring.

Alina breathes it in like it's her salvation.

I guide her to the railing and stay close. I will always be near. One of my hands rests on her lower back. She leans forward, supporting herself with both hands on the stone edge, her eyes closed.

“Better?” I murmur.

She nods slowly. “Much.”

I study her in the moonlight. Her hair’s tousled, face pale, lips dry. But even like this—even now—she’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

She opens her eyes, glancing at me. “You haven’t slept either, have you?”

I shake my head. “Didn’t plan to.”

“Lev…”

“I’m not leaving you,kotyonok.”

She leans her head against my shoulder and whispers, “I know.”

And for a moment, we don’t speak. Just breathe. Just feel.

Her head rests softly on my shoulder. She hasn’t said anything for a while, but I can sense it—something swirling behind her silence. Not fear. Not doubt. Just truth, waiting to be spoken.

“Lev,” she finally says softly, her voice still rough. “Can I ask you something?”

I nod, even though I already know what’s coming.

“Why did you leave?”

There it is. Not an accusation. Just a question. But it slices through me sharper than any blade I’ve ever used. I don’t answer right away. Instead, I watch the wind stir her hair and feel the weight of every wrong decision I’ve ever made settle in my chest. It’s heavier tonight, somehow. Or maybe it’s just because I can’t hide from it anymore.

“I thought,” I begin, my voice rough, “that if I leave, I could stop wanting you.”

She stiffens a little beside me.

“I thought… you’d move on. That someone else—someone clean, someone whole—would step in. That maybe you’d forget me and find a future without someone whose family name is as weighty as yours.”

“Lev…”

“I’ve done things,” I cut in, sharper than I mean to. “Things you don’t even want to imagine. I’ve broken men. I’ve made people disappear. I’ve killed with my hands and laughed afterward.”

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