Page 95 of Riot

It can’t be true. I’d know if my nightmare was gone, wouldn’t I?

“What happened?” The rasp of my own words is harsh in the silence.

“Does it matter?”

It’s not an answer. The walls are closing in, and the air is suddenly too thin. I can’t breathe. My hand presses to my constricted heart, which is about to burst out of my chest.

He shoves his hands in his pockets, as if that’s the only way he can stop himself from reaching for me, from touching me. “I didn’t want you to find out like this.”

“Or at all?” I snap, blinking the haze from my eyes. “Did you ever plan on telling me?”

Hurt spirals, sharp and violent. The sting of betrayal from the one person I trusted with my heart and soul is bitter.

“No.”

One word, just one fucking word, and it cuts like a thousand blades.

“At least that’s honest.” Sarcasm drips from my tone, and I don’t rein it back. I don’t know how I feel. How am I meant to feel? He’s telling me the monster I’ve been running from is gone, and yet it doesn’t feel like a victory. Because all this time, he knew. He had a way to ease my suffering, and he kept quiet.

“I can’t stay.”

I step around him, but he moves with me, blocking my path without touching me.

“I ain’t lettin’ you walk out of here.”

I gather Seren closer. “You can’t stop me.”

“Babe, be pissed at me—you have every right to be—but do it after we figure out who’s targetin’ you.”

Right. The reason I came here. The bastard who wants to scare me to death.

Seren whimpers, and I glance down at her.

I don’t want to be here, but leaving puts my daughter at risk. This whole situation was terrifying enough when I thought I was facing her father.

It’s a whole new level of dread knowing it’s not.

“She okay?” The concern and fear in his words softens some of my anger.

“Yeah. She’s just fussy.”

He claims the space between us, hesitant, but I don’t move this time. I can’t. My body is lead, but it reacts to his closeness, seeking comfort from him. I want him to wrap his arms around me and tell me everything will be okay even as I want to slam my hands against his chest and ask why.

I need to protect my heart. I can’t let him past the walls I’ve hastily thrown up.

“You lied to me. All this time, and you just… lied.”

“Ain’t sorry for that, Vee, but I am sorry it hurts you.”

What kind of fucking logic is that?“I’ve been terrified of him. The nightmares, thinking I was seeing him… all that time scared, and he wasn’t even alive.”

I cover my mouth with the back of my hand, bile coating my throat.

“Fuck,” Riot mutters.

“What am I supposed to do with that? How am I supposed to trust you?”

His throat bobs, his expression shredded. “There’s always gonna be shit that I can’t tell you,” he murmurs, “but I kept that darkness away from you ‘cause you don’t deserve that filth to touch you.”

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