Page 59 of The Wedding Game

All of that was more painful to hear than I thought it would be. I need to get out of here. How do I extricate myself from her without leaving her stranded? Although she’s been getting on well enough by herself these past two weeks, so in theory I could.

‘Do you want to go over to the chalets again and get something to eat?’ she asks. ‘I’m starving.’

‘Sure,’ I say.

As we tuck into our burgers at bench tables, we talk about what she’s going to be doing for Max when she gets back home, how we’re each going to be spending the upcoming weekend (sleeping off jet lag for her, dinner and a movie with Kayla for me) and what new adventures lie on the horizon for us both.

‘Even though I’m potless,’ Lexie starts, ‘my upcoming jaunts include a wedding in the new year and a spa day with Scarlet, which I won via wedding bingo.’

‘Sounds great,’ I enthuse. And then I chuckle to myself, ‘Wedding bingo.’

‘Yeah, yeah,’ she says. ‘Don’t harp on about it.’

I’m quiet and then I surprise both of us by saying, ‘Wedding bingo is ridiculous, but it’s not as extreme as getting on a plane with someone you’ve only just met.’

Lexie looks at me from under her lashes. She’s incredibly still.

I get brave. ‘Do you ever think: thank God I dodgedthatbullet?’

‘No … I don’t,’ she replies as I watch her carefully.

Neither of us speaks and then slowly she forms a sentence. ‘On reflection, I do think this fortnight has given me a good idea as to what it might have been like, if I had.’

I frown. ‘What New York is like, or what being with me would be like?’I can’t believe I just asked that.

‘Chris,’ she says lightly, but it sounds like more of a warning, an emotional reprimand, than an invitation to go down this path. ‘I’ve wondered,’ she admits slowly. Of course I’ve wondered what it would have been like if I’d come with you. How could I not?’

You mean you wondered all the way back to Josh, and then kissed him?I think, but don’t say.

‘Iwondered,’ I tell her, giving her my full attention because even though nothing good can come of it, I’ve hung on for so long I’m practically exploding to say it. ‘I wondered on that flight home what it would be like. I kept looking at the guy who was seated next to me and thinking, “That could have been Lexie.” Then he fell asleep on my shoulder and that’s when I definitely wished it was you.’

She has the grace to smile and gives a tiny laugh.

‘I got back to my apartment,’ I continue, ‘and envisagedshowing you to my room while I slept on the sofa, or maybe not sleeping on the sofa. I thought about where we’d go for brunch, dinner. I thought about continuing Big Talk and oh … I dunno.’

‘You actually thought about sleeping on the sofa?’ she asks doubtfully.

I shrug, but my eyes don’t leave hers. ‘Asking you to come with me to New York was the most romantic gesture I’ve ever made.’

‘You’re dodging the question.’

I laugh, glance down, glance back up again. What will happen if I say all the things I can’t stop thinking about?

Her mouth opens a fraction. I can’t help looking at her mouth. Christ, I really want to kiss her. Right here. Right now.

I force myself not to. I force myself to keep talking. ‘It’s not the Victorian era,’ I point out, my eyes on her lips as they remain slightly parted. I need to look away, so I plant my gaze on her brown eyes. They’re the same colour as mine and yet they look so different, so distinctive, so much … more.

‘Would you have kissed me?’ she asks in wonder.

This conversation is so dangerous. I can’t stop. ‘Yeah, I’d have kissed you – at some point on our journey to the airport and most of the long flight. If you’d have let me.’

‘I’d have let you,’ she says so quickly that she looks surprised at herself.

I swallow. ‘And then …’

‘And then?’ she echoes.

‘We’d have seen how we felt, discovered what felt natural between us together.’

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