Page 115 of If You Stayed

“You’re being a jerk. You can’t stop me from going,” Ava said.

“Shut the hell up,” Henry shouted, slamming his hand against the table. “I don’t want to hear another word about that man in my house, do you fucking understand?”

I saw it happen—the moment my daughter began to shrink from her father’s tone. It was as if a bright light was being forced to dim.

At least he never yells in front of Ava.

Her tears fell down her cheeks, but she sat tall. “You’re just mad because everyone likes Gabriel more than you.”

Oh no. This wasn’t going to be good.

He cleared his throat. “Ava—”

“You are! You’re mad that I like him more than you, and Mom likes him more than you! And did you know they were in love?” My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach.Ohno, Ava. Please stop…“They were in love when they were kids, and he treated her better than you ever treated her! Because he’s not a monster. She’s actually happy with him because he’s not mean to her and doesn’t hurt her feelings and doesn’t—”

“Enough!” he hollered, slamming his hands against the table again. “Shut your mouth before I shut it for you, Ava Melanie.” The whole table shook, glasses falling over. My stomach caught in my throat. The rage shooting through him sent a panic through me that I wasn’t ready to face. That I wasn’t ready for Ava to witness. His breathing was erratic.

Ava had tears rolling down her cheeks as the room filled with silence. She pushed herself away from the table, looked Henry straight in the eyes, and said, “I hate you.”

She stormed off to her bedroom, and I was right behind her.

“Ava—”

“Why wouldn’t you stand up for me?” Ava cried as I entered her room. “Why do you let him talk to you like that? Why do you let him hurt you so much?”

“It’s complicated.”

“It’s not,” she argued. “The only thing I don’t understand is why you don’t stand up to him. I hate him, Mom. I hate him so much and I know you do, too, but I don’t understand why you’d let him do these things.”

“Ava, you have to understand. I’m working to figure this out. I’m working harder than you’d ever know to make sure we are good.”

“We’d be good without him,” she told me. “I’m going toGrandma’s. I already texted her, and she’s on her way.”

“Ava—”

“I love you, Mom,” she cut in as she rushed to me and hugged me. She hugged me tighter than she’d ever hugged me before. I choked on my next breath, pushing down the sob that was trying its hardest to escape from between my lips. “I just wished you loved you, too.”

I shut my eyes, kissed her forehead, and let her go.

I stayed in her bedroom after she headed off with Tamera. A part of me wished I’d gone with her. I wished I’d packed a bag and headed over to Tamera’s, too, to escape the prison I resided in.

After she left, I headed back to the dining room to clean up the table. As I was doing so, Henry reappeared in the room, a look of disdain on his face.

“You knew Gabriel Sinclair before he began working on the project?” he asked.

Chills raced through my system, knowing that this conversation wouldn’t lead to anything good. “We don’t have to talk about that.”

“The hell we don’t. What the hell did Ava mean about that? Were you in love with him?”

“I knew him when we were young. It was a long time ago, Henry, and Gabriel didn’t even remember me.”

“But you remembered him,” he urged. “Were you playing me this whole time?”

“What?” I chuckled slightly, stunned by the question. “Of course not. I wasn’t the one who hired Gabriel, remember?That was you.”

“But you were mocking me this whole time.” He moved over to me as I gathered a stack of plates. “Did you get off on embarrassing me? And did you enjoy having Ava mad at me?”

“I didn’t embarrass you, Henry. Also, Ava being mad at you has nothing to do with me.”

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