Page 50 of Cruel Longing

“What is that?”

“The tracker my father had Ciro install when I was sixteen.” She reached for my hand and brushed it over her skin. I could barely feel a variation in the smoothness. I thought about how many times I’d kissed her there. I’d never noticed it.

“He did what?”

“Don’t you have one?” Her eyes searched mine.

“Hell, no. That’s insane. You need to take it out. Now.”

“But it’s how Ciro found me. He had the code and the software. Without him, no one would have known where I was. This stupid chip is what led him to the basement.”

It might have saved her once, but I knew those things were trouble. The longer she had it, the more jeopardy she was in.

“I don’t think you should keep it. There have been way too many hacks lately in the software companies who manufacture those tracking devices. Look, believe me. I’ve been doing the research in tech since I’ve been back. If I thought it was safe, I wouldn’t push for this. But you need to get that thing out. Anyone could track you, Amara. You will never be truly safe.”

She let her hair fall back into place. My hands still rested at her neck.

“All right. I’ll have Ciro take it out tomorrow.”

I exhaled. “Good.” That was one less thing to have to worry about. “Did he try to find out who kidnapped you?”

She pinched her lips together. Her eyes moved to the window, even though the curtains were drawn for the evening.

“Who was it?” I pushed. “Which family?”

“That’s the problem.”

The knot spun in my stomach. It was getting tighter. “Which family?”

She looked at me. “I still don’t know.”

Twenty-Four

AMARA

Ihated telling the story. I hated hearing the words out loud. I hadn’t gone through the details in four years. The one person who had all the information before now was Ciro. He was the only one. The story lived in my head alone. It was easier to pretend it didn’t happen if I kept it close. Only, pretending it didn’t happen didn’t keep me alive. Remembering kept me alive.

Luka’s eyes were dark. I could only imagine how upset hearing all of this made him. I had to reassure him Ciro had done everything possible.

“There was never a ransom. No one came forward. I still don’t know who it was. Ciro and I have a short list of suspects, but in all these years he was never able to pin it on one family. I have to assume it could have been any of them. All of them.”

“I’d like to know how he found you, especially without a note.” Did I hear distrust in his voice?

“You do realize that Ciro is the most loyal employee I’ve ever had. He saved my life. He found me when no one else even looked. They were focused on my father, not me. Counting his breaths instead of making sure I had more. He was it. I’m only here because of him. No one but Ciro.” My voice was more pained than I wanted it to be. Our conversation was spiraling. I had lost control of the narrative. His anger and fear were starting to dominate the room.

“Okay. Okay. I’m sorry.” Luka looked away, but not before I saw how tense his jaw was. “It’s fucking messed up, that’s all. Someone grabbed you out of your own house and four years later you’re no closer to justice?”

“Justice?” I huffed. “Don’t you think I’ve had my justice on this city?”

He turned slowly. I saw the recognition in his eyes. “That’s it. The loan rates. The ruthless buybacks. You’ve been making everyone pay.”

“I don’t trust anyone.” My eyes narrowed. “How can I? Why should I? Someone knows who the kidnapper was. No one has come forward. They all deserve to pay. Everyone is guilty until I know who did it.”

He covered his face with his hands and groaned. “Damn it, Amara.”

“What? Would you do it differently as the Pakhan?” I snapped. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to sit in the same room around a table of men who are responsible for the biggest nightmare of your life? You have to look in their eyes and smile. Act as if you’re fine. Act as if you don’t sleep with armed guards outside your bedroom door every night. Act as if the worstthing that happened when you were locked below the street was that you chipped a nail. You don’t know what that’s like. Don’t pretend you know. Don’t pretend that you’d do anything differently than I have done.”

He raised his hands in the air. “I don’t know. What I do know is that you made everyone pay.”

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