Page 39 of Sticking Out

“Looks like you’re ready for bed too.”

“Oh, did you want to stay up longer?” she asks, her lids half closed.

I give her a playful smile. “Nope.” I ease from the sofa and scoop up Zoe. “We’ve had far too many late nights.”

“I don’t know if I’d say far too many,” she responds sleepily, her eyes warm, sated, and full of happiness. I’m not sure I remember seeing Dani this happy. Was she ever this happy with Alec? Would she hate me if she knew the secret I was keeping, and that I was the reason he was dead?

Pushing those hard thoughts to the back of my mind, I follow Dani to the stairs. We head up and she goes into the spare room and pulls down the covers. Zoe had been to Dani’s house, just never mine. In fact, it’s been a long time since I’ve had anyone in my place. I sort of stopped living after my brother’s death. But we showed her around earlier, and let her know where our room was if she needed us.

Dani tucks her in and turns on the nightlight she picked up when we knew we were taking Zoe. She stops at the door, and the longing in her is palpable as she stares at the sweet, sleeping child. My God, it makes me want to put a baby in her all the more.

We make our way across the hall and after we brush our teeth and wash our faces, I tug off my clothes, turn the lamp on and climb into bed. Dani leaves on her T-shirt and panties and crawls in beside me.

She rolls into me, and as I breathe in the scent of her hair my mind goes back to this afternoon. “Did you enjoy getting in the pool today?”

“It was fun,” she murmurs, and I don’t miss the hitch in her voice.

“Hey,” I inch away to see her and she angles her head to see me. “Did you just want it to be us and Noah’s family? You seemed upset when I told you the guys were coming.”

“It’s just…”

I pull her to me. “What?”

“I told you before that I don’t always feel like I fit in. I’m not…like the other women.”

“No, you’re not.” She looks down, and I continue. “Which is why you’re in this bed and they’re not.”

She gives an almost hysterical laugh. “I’m in this bed because we’re trying to make a baby.”

“What if I told you otherwise? That you’re in this bed because out of all the women at the pool today, you’re the one I like best.”

“Summer was there, you know that, right? She was the girl you asked out. She’s not the one who asked you for a favor. You picked her.”

I’d actually picked Dani first, all those years ago. I just didn’t think I was good enough for her, and then when my big brother, who always watched out for me, swooped in, that was that.

Under her breath she adds, “I’m not tall and thin and gorgeous like the other women.”

“For the record, not every man likes tall and thin, and also for the record, you’re fucking gorgeous. I’ve thought that since the first time I laid eyes on you.” She rolls her eyes like she doesn’t believe that and I slide my hand over her hip. “You’re sexy as hell, Dani, and you speak French, now that is a real turn on.” She grins, her mood shifting. “Do you have any idea how much I wanted to sink my teeth into these curves today when you were out there in your bathing suit?”

“Really?”

This time she sounds like she might half believe me. “Yes, really.” I go quiet for a second, guilt eating at me. I can’t tell her everything but she needs to know some things—even if this could change everything, but it’s the right thing to do and a chance I have to take.

Since we’re being completely honest with each other, I begin. “I don’t always feel like I fit in either.”

Her head rears back. “What are you talking about?”

“I had a hard time growing up.” I shrug but the memories are still painful. “I couldn’t learn like other kids.”

“You had some struggles.” Her voice is soft, and gentle, and it wraps around me and squeezes tight. “Everyone has struggles in different areas, Conner.”

I swallow against a painful lump. “What if our child…” I really don’t want to pass down my struggles.

“What if our child, what?”

“I know you want my DNA.” I shift in the bed, uncomfortably warm now. “I understand why, but what if my DNA is flawed?”

She sits up, crosses her legs and faces me. “You are not flawed in any way.”

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