Page 7 of False Start

“Vanessa...” I start because she’s kind of killing me.

“I don’t mind though.” She turns to me with a bright, killer smile. “You know I love you too. We’re a little unconventional, but I’m cool with it.”

I grimace because she so wouldn’t be if she knew I jerked off in the shower today, thinking about her boyfriend. That I do that often. As often as I can because it quells the undying need for him for a few moments.

“He loves you,” I say again, more for my benefit than for hers.

Her eyes search mine for a brief moment, and she never stops smiling. “I know, silly. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She shoves my shoulder before she bounces down the steps to greet Vaughn, who has his arms out for her before she reaches the bottom step.

I watch as he wraps his big arms around her, holding her close and kissing her before she playfully shoves him away for being sweaty. She leaves with a quick wave to me and one more kiss for him before he runs up the stairs to me. “You mind waiting for me while I shower? Apparently, I’m totally gross,” he says with a smile that kills me.

“Nope. I’ll wait,” I say and sit back down on the bleachers before he heads into the locker room, and I try not to picture him showering because that’s just creepy.

I need to tell him soon.

Really soon.

Because I can’t do this anymore. I can’t go to college with him and watch him go through his life with me by his side—but never having his heart.

5

VAUGHN

“Thank you, Mrs. Pierce,” I say when Austin’s awesome mom hands me a plate to take with me to his room. I’m beat after school and practice, and thankfully, Mrs. Pierce doesn’t have thewe only eat at the tablerule, like my own mom.

Good choice, going to Austin’s after school. Though, when my broody best friend walks into his bedroom with his own plate, he kind of makes me rethink that. I don’t know what’s up with him lately.

I mean, he’s always been the strong, silent type, but it’s getting worse lately. Like he can barely look me in the eyes sometimes. It has me worried, and if I’m honest, I don’t worry much. Never have.

He kicks off his shoes and plops down on his bed next to me, our backs against the wall as we sit with our plates on our laps. “What’s bugging you?” I chance asking him because I really want to know. Maybe I can fix it.

I’m good at fixing things.

He huffs. “Seriously?” He takes a bite and chews. “We just had this talk this morning.”

“Yeah.” I take a mouthwatering bite of my own and chew before speaking. “But I don’t think you really answered me earlier. I know I don’t have your brains, but I’m not totally dumb. I know when something is up.”

At least when it comes to him, I do.

“Nothing is wrong.” His eyes meet mine. “I promise.” And there it is. He’s lying to me. I’ve always been able to tell. Why is he lying to me? In the past, if he’s lied—it’s always been about dumb stuff, like not being sick when I totally know he’s sick. The guy does not like to admit it.

Oh God, what if he’s like really, really sick?

“I’m fine,” he says, probably noticing I’m freaking the fuck out. But he’s my best friend. He can’t be sick. “I promise. Had a physical a couple of weeks ago, actually, and I’m all good.”

I let out a relieved breath. “Why did you have a physical? You don’t play sports.”

That gains a laugh from him, and I cherish it. “You know people other than jocks go to the doctor too, right?”

I shove his arm. “Shut up.”

He laughs, and we eat in quiet for a bit, but I still know something is bothering him, which means something is also bothering me until he tells me what’s going on. I think about this morning and Calvin purposely ramming into him.

“Is it Calvin?”

“What?” He shakes his head at me. “No. Of course not. Why?”

“I don’t like the way he looks at you.”