Page 179 of Hate Mates

“Don’t cry.”

I nod. “We’ll see you soon, okay.”

He waves, and Lochlan does the same, cutting off the call.

We sit in silence until the tears have dried in both of our eyes.

“The bruise,” Lochlan is the first to talk. “You still haven’t told me.”

“Your brother interrupted.”

“Well, he’s needy. Always been the same. It can’t be helped. But he’s hung up on us, so, back to it. The bruise.”

Suddenly, after seeing what a loving family looks like, the truth is harder to voice, so I attempt a lie. “I did it at work. I work with children and?—”

“You’re lying.”

“What? You know what, never mind. I was lying. The truth is just hard.” I attempt to sit up, but his hand flattens to my spine, keeping me closer than I want to be right now.

“Harder than admitting to my parents that you lied about me?”

“I’m not sure anything was ever so hard. I really thought I’d pass out, but Colten had to know, just in case.”

“We’ll make it to him. We have to. I’m gonna need to see him.”

“Yeah.”

“You’re still avoiding my question.”

“You’re avoiding telling me how you knew my answer wasn’t true?”

“You had that exact same look on your face that you did in the courtroom. When you lie, your nostrils flare slightly, and your eyes widen. I don’t know how I notice this shit, but I do.”

“You’re paying too much attention.”

“Maybe. Maybe I had a little crush on you before the lies and stuff. You know, the ones you’re still telling. Such a bad habit.”

“I thought I bored you with that quick fumble.” I sit up in his lap, my eyebrows raised, and my stare on him.

“I was prepared to teach you new skills.”

It shouldn’t have made me laugh—the cocky jibe and more tears certainly shouldn’t have followed.

He pulls me back in, but I’m still straddling him, and I’m all too aware of the effect it has on him.

“Calling you boring was insensitive, given the timing of our?—”

“Shh...” my finger lands on his cold lips. “You don’t have to apologize to me. Up until an hour before, I was a virgin. So, add that to the trauma, and I was probably kinda useless.”

“Maybe I should have helped you in another way.”

“No. I told you it was okay. I wanted to dismiss it and forget how that creep pushed me to the floor, how he put his fingers inside me and laughed as I cried. “There’s a bite to my voice. “I couldn’t face the fact that was my first experience, and I didn’t really know how else to go about it.”

Memories flash in my mind, a gentle voice whispering, “Can I help you try and forget him?”

A younger me nods as Lochlan kisses my neck. I’m in his lap, rocking gently on my grandfather’s giant chair. A hand slips under my cropped tee, finding my hardening nipple, a pointed tip circling. His lips, pressing against my neck, breathe out the words, “Are you okay so far?”

“I’m fine. Don’t stop. Please, don’t stop. It needs to feel different, or I’ll never get over it.”

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