Page 97 of Reckless
“So,” I breathe, “why mine?”
He finally meets my gaze, shaking his head slightly. “Your spirit is familiar. You remind me of what could have been. In another life, I think Ava would have grown up to be like you.”
I struggle to laugh. “What, you wanted her to be a criminal?”
“No,” he murmurs. “I wanted her to be formidable. Recklessly bold. Powerful despite ability.”
I stare at him, taking in each word.
“I am none of those things,” I whisper.
He drops my hand to brush gentle fingers beneath my chin, raising my face up toward his. “You are much more than those things.”
“You overestimate me.”
“No. I justseeyou.”
Adena was the only person who had ever truly seen me and stayed despite it. But she is gone. And it’s the prince meant to kill me who now says the words she used to reassure me with.
I swallow the sentences I don’t know how to say. “I’ve never cared enough to kiss someone else’s thumb,” he continues softly. “But my lips found yours that day.”
“And look at where that got you,” I whisper, fighting my smile.
My gaze travels over his face, from the gray eyes that see me to the soft lips that have tasted me. I feel myself falling into something familiar, like a trap I’m willingly walking back into. His hand is firm on my back, burning like a brand and pulling me closer with each step of this back-and-forth dance between us. Once again, I find myself walking the sharp end of a blade, knowing it will inevitably cut me in the end.
And yet, my fingers find his hair. My body presses against his. My heart beats to be broken.
He smiles in that way that has me suddenly smiling back. Dirt crunches beneath my boots as we dance in the dark, the chain wrapping around my leg to continually trip me. I huff, irritated with the damn thing. Kai chuckles when I stumble into him for the dozenth time, to which I glance up with a glare.
“Don’t hurt yourself, darling.” Before I even have the chance to respond, he’s wrapping his arm fully around my waist and lifting me onto his boots.
“What the hell…?”
He grins, flashing both dimples at me. “Let me dance for the both of us.”
I swallow my protests, looking down at my booted feet atop his. The arms he winds around my waist are strong, secure in the way they hold me against him. “Kai,” I whisper. “We shouldn’t…”
“Shh.” His mouth is against my ear. “Pretend.”
The word floods me with a false sense of relief, as though I’m suddenly allowed to want this. To pretend that this is okay. I twine my hands around his neck, struggling to smile with all the emotion crowding my face.
He stops abruptly, searching my eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” I smile sadly, fighting the tears that threaten to fall. “I just… I used to do this with my father. That’s why I never learned to dance properly.” My laugh sounds pained. “Because he always just did it for me.”
He nods, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. “I’m sorry I did this to you.”
I sniffle quietly. “Did what?”
“This hurt,” he murmurs.
We sway in silence for a long while before I finally allow my head to rest on his chest. He’s a weakness. A comfort I shouldn’t allow myself to seek out. But I let his feet guide mine, shutting my eyes against the flood of memories.
“He used to dance for me until I fell asleep,” I whisper against his chest.
I feel him nod against my hair. “Then we’ll dance until you’re dreaming of him.”
CHAPTER 36Kai
