Page 131 of Reckless
“Kai…”
“Pae.”
My name from his lips is a weakness I shouldn’t let him hold over me.
“I think I would fall on my sword if it meant you mourned me,” he breathes. “And it’s terrifying to think you hold that much power over me.”
He closes the distance between us, tilting my chin up so I meet his gaze. “You asked me what my favorite color was once. I’d never even pondered the answer to that question before you. And yet, I realized in that moment that it was blue.” He bends to brush a kiss to my temple, a murmur against my skin. “It is your eyes.”
I take a shaky breath, feeling his on my face.
“Tell me you hate me, and I’ll still count every heartbeat, every freckle, every shiver of your body, if only you say it with a smile.” He backs away, freeing my face from his hands. “I may be a monster, but if you cut me, I’ll bleed. And if you break my heart, Pae, you’ll break me. So, if even a sliver of your soul longs for mine, I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to deserve it.”
My eyes are glassy, rimmed with tears I’m too stubborn to let fall. The plea in his gaze is poetic. He flexes his hands at his side, as though it’s an effort to keep them off me. I take in his hair of petals and eyes of ice that only seem to melt when they fall on me.
“Maybe you really are a poet,” I whisper.
He smiles softly. “Or just a fool for you.”
“Pretend?”
My voice is small, soft like the breeze blowing through my short hair.
“Never.”
“None of it?” I ask quietly.
“Darling”—he smiles—“I have never had to pretend to want you.”
His words have my heart stuttering before realization hits me. “What about our fathers?” I blurt. “What we did to one another?”
“I won’t spend the rest of my life hating you for saving yourself.” He sighs deeply. “I know why you did what you did. And I hope you understand why I did the same.”
“I…” Words I thought I would never say are suddenly caught in my throat. “I forgive you, Kai. I think I might have a while ago. Because I can forgive you for what you didn’t even know you were doing.”
His eyes flutter closed in relief.
“I wanted to kill you,” I whisper, forcing his eyes open. “I wanted to be your undoing. But even then, I knew I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I had.”
He inches toward me, head shaking and eyes roaming as though overwhelmed by what he is seeing. “Oh, but you are my undoing. My deliverance. My downfall disguised as a deity.” Another slow step. “You are my ruin.”
I’m dazed, unable to do anything but let a smile tug at my lips.
“Call us even. Call me crazy. I don’t care. Just…” His eyes are pleading, brimming with emotion. “Just call me yours.”
We stare at each other for several thundering heartbeats.
“Flicking my nose,” I breathe.
His brows crinkle. “What?”
“Flicking my nose,” I repeat simply. “Something I’ve always had a thing for. Among others, of course.”
Understanding lights his eyes as a slow smile spreads across his lips, accompanied by dimples on either side. “Go on, darling.”
“That reminds me.” I nod. “Calling me ‘darling.’ Cocky bastards. Long, dark eyelashes…”
I could melt from the heat in his gaze.
