Page 132 of Reckless
“Knowing what I need exactly when I need it. Ripping my dresses. Dimples that make me—”
In a single step, he’s closed the distance between us and pulled my mouth to his.
He kisses me deeply, breathing me in. I melt against him, memorizing the feel of his hands running over my body. I press a hand to his cheek while one of his finds my hair, threading it between his fingers.
I pull away just far enough to pant, “Have you really counted my freckles?”
“All twenty-eight of them,” he breathes before kissing me hard. “Though, you might have more now from the sun.” Another quick kiss. “I’ll have to do a recount.”
My laugh has him pulling me closer, nipping at the tip of my nose with his teeth.
I wrap my arms around his neck. He is my anchor, and I am willing to sink, so long as it is with him.
With each kiss, he captures the three words I’m too scared to say. I hope he can taste them on the tip of my tongue, read them on the curve of my lips. Because uttering the words feels like a death sentence. Every person I’ve ever loved has left me.
I’m cursed to lose in love. But that is what I feel for him, what I’ve felt even when I hated him. Because hating him was easier than hating myself for wanting him.
So I bite my tongue. I fight the urge to shout those three seemingly harmless words at him. Because wherever I love, people die. And I’d rather love him silently than mourn him loudly.
He pulls away, breathing heavy. “You need to get out of here.”
Slipping my dagger from his boot, he crouches before the chaintethering us together. “What about you?” I stammer. “What about your mission. And Kitt—”
“Don’t worry about me.” He wedges the blade between the seam of the cuff around my ankle, trying to pry it apart. “I can handle Kitt. He already thought I wouldn’t be able to bring you back anyway.”
“He did?”
He huffs humorlessly. “Yeah. He figured I would do exactly what it is I’m doing now—letting you go.” He strains against the handle of my dagger. “It seems he was right to doubt me.”
I drop down beside him, crushing poppies beneath me. “What does this mean?”
He doesn’t answer, eyes trained on the stubborn chain.
“Kai. What does this mean?”
He stops long enough to look up at me. “It means you are going to get as far away from here as possible. I’ll stall the search for you as long as I can, but you need to find a way to get to Izram by then.”
I shake my head. “No.”
“Yes, Pae.”
“No.” My voice is stern. “No, I’m sick of running. And I won’t spend the rest of my life doing it unless it’s you I’m running back to.”
“Then I’ll spend the rest of my life tracking you down,” he says quietly. “Glimpsing you in the shadows. Fighting you in the streets. Dancing with you in my dreams. Because living without you is only bearable when I know you are out there still living too.”
“Please,” I whisper.
“Kitt won’t let me stop hunting you.” He puts a hand to my cheek. “You have to—”
He stops abruptly, his head tilting slightly to the side.
“What?” I ask hesitantly. “What is it?”
He says nothing, a muscle ticking in his cheek the only movement.
“Kai?”
His eyes meet mine suddenly. “They’re coming.”
