Page 84 of Knot Your Baby

I hate the tubes that snake from her nose and mouth. The ventilator’s mechanical breathing is for her own good. The doctor explained it and then Miller explained it again.

I’ve struggled to take it in, but they say she’s put her body into what the doctor called an omega drop, a prolonged coma to safeguard her because her stress levels are too high. She’sexperienced this since her teens, at least according to her records.

And it’s all my fault.

I reach for her hand, careful not to disturb the IV that pokes at the top of her hand. I have never once heard of an omega doing this. Miller has, but he thought she’d come through once her body found its strength, but thirty minutes later and even he decided she needed hospital intervention.

Miller says her skin is warming up, but to me, her skin is still cool to the touch, nothing like the warmth I felt when I caught her as she collapsed. The memory of her omega scent in that moment mixing with distress, fear, still haunts me.

How had I not recognized it sooner?

Because you choose to not believe her.

I hate myself for that.

“I’m so sorry,” I whisper, my voice breaking in the solemn room. The beeping of the monitors is my only answer. “I’m so goddamn sorry, Freya.”

My thumb traces circles on the back of her hand as I lean closer.

“I smell you now. I’m sorry I took the blockers. I was just too stubborn, too angry about my past, about the girl I never knew but fell in love with. I wanted no one but her. I wish I knew it was you. I want you so much. I’m sorry—” My throat tightens around the confession. “I know why you followed me. Fuck! Only now do I understand, but you knew all along. You knew we were scent matches. And I was too fucking stupid.”

The ventilator hisses, pushing air into her lungs. I watch her chest rise.

“I promise when you wake up, I’ll be different.” The promise is raw, true and desperate. “I need to tell you properly. Need you to hear me. I’ve been so blind, so cruel. I just hope you still want me.”

The tears I’ve been fighting spill over, dropping onto our joined hands.

“Let me show you how sorry I am. Please! Let me make it right.” My voice drops to a murmur. “Let me love you the way I should have from the beginning.”

My alpha instincts are in turmoil. I want to protect and comfort her. I want to claim her, but is she beyond my reach now?

The scent of my distress fills the small room, mingling with the antiseptic hospital smell.

“Our baby needs you,” I murmur, then correct myself. “Weneed you.”

I press my forehead against our entwined fingers, finally allowing myself to acknowledge the truth I’ve been fighting for so long.

“You’re my mate, Freya. My true mate. And I almost lost you because I was too stuck in the past to see it.”

The doors open and Zane walks in with Miller.

“I called her parents. Her father is on his way,” Miller says. “Apparently, she’s had some minor drops, but this is the third major drop she’s had. The first in her teens when her body was transitioning into an omega and the second when her brother died.”

“Her brother.” I stare at Zane and he nods.

The monitors continue their steady rhythm as Zane pushes the stroller into the corner of the room. “I’ve fed and changed him.”

I stand and walk to my son, taking him out of the stroller and holding him against my chest as I nudge next to Freya on the bed and snuggle our son between us. Letting her smell us.

Outside, the hospital carries on, but in this room, time stands suspended between heartbeats.

Zane stares at me. His hand rests on my forearm as tears lace his eyes. “Sorry.”

I shake my head, not understanding.

“I put you through this once before and now I know how much it fucking hurts.”

I give him a half smile. “It’s fine. I understand you have to do what you love, and I’ll stop pestering you to leave the fire service. I just don’t want to lose you. You’re my baby brother and I love you.”

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