Page 97 of In Good Company

Their words fade away as I focus on what Jude said. The guilt flooding me is overwhelming.

He can’t get out of bed?

Tears prick my eyes at the image of him being so heartbroken he can’t even get up in the morning. I never wanted to cause him pain. He’s the last person in this world I wanted to hurt, and I still did.

A tear runs down my cheek. I try to wipe it away beforeeither of them can see it, but Charlotte wrestles the phone back from Jude just in time to see me do it.

“I’m so sorry,” she gets out, a little out of breath. Her shoulders rise and fall quickly from the effort it took to get the phone back from Jude.

He gently pushes her to the side, allowing his face to be in view as well. Charlotte shoots a dirty look in his direction, but she doesn’t push him out of frame.

“Fuck, Luce, I didn’t mean to make you cry,” Jude says, his features softening as I wipe underneath my eyes again.

I shake my head, trying to regain my composure. It’s my responsibility to close up the store tonight, but I wouldn’t be shocked if Alec randomly dropped by to make sure I’m doing it right. He seems to be checking on me a lot since I’ve tried taking things over. I can’t say I blame him.

“It’s fine, I promise,” I try to assure him. I don’t miss the way my voice shakes. Knowing he’s still not doing well two weeks after me leaving is taking its toll. My resolve to do the right thing and leave him alone is slowly getting chipped away.

All that’s left is the intense way that I miss him and the desperate desire to hear his voice.

“You know…if you called, he’d answer,” Jude prods. He keeps his voice soft but doesn’t back down when Charlotte aims another dirty look in his direction.

“Would he?” I counter. I don’t know if I’d blame him if he didn’t want to talk to me. He opened up to me and confessed his feelings, and instead of me being honest and telling him I’m in love with him, I called him a distraction.

I’ll never forget the anguish etched into his features. I don’t know if I can repair the damage I did. Especially since I still don’t know if we could ever make it work. At least right now. Not with me having to take care of things here.

“Luce,” Jude begins, pulling me from my thoughts. “I’veknown Cal almost my entire life. The only thing I’ve ever seen him really love was his job—until you. The moment he hired you, he changed. He loves you. And he’s my best friend, so I’m allowed to say this, but he isn’t built to love a lot of things. But when he does, he loves hard. I don’t think there’s anything you could do or say that he wouldn’t forgive you for. Call him. Tell him you love him—because I know you do—and then together, you can figure out the rest.”

Charlotte wipes at her eyes a little, looking at Jude with a shocked expression. “When did you become so sweet?”

Her comment makes me laugh. I mimic her, wiping at my falling tears thanks to what Jude said.

“I know I hurt him,” I explain to Jude, my words coming out shaky. I’m sure I seem like a complete mess right now. I can’t stop the tears from falling, and I’m not even trying to hide them at this point.

“I can guarantee you that not speaking to him is hurting him more than any words you have said or could say to him,” Jude points out.

I let out a shaky sigh, realizing he might be right. I thought I was doing the right thing by ending things with Cal. We have two very different lives, and instead of figuring out with him how we could make things work, I pushed him away. I didn’t think it was possible to juggle a relationship with him and my responsibilities here in Virginia.

In the two weeks since I last saw him, I’ve learned I don’t know if it’s possible to move on with my life without him.

I’m so in love with him that I miss him to my core. I thought loving him would be a distraction, but the more I think about it, maybe the real distraction is missing him.

If I had him to talk to at the end of the day and allowed him to be there for me, I think I’d be in a much better headspace to handle things here at home.

“I love him,” I blurt, sitting straight up in my chair. It’s so old it creaks because of the sudden movement.

Jude fist pumps in the air, letting out a long whistle. “Yes, Luce, you do. Now, hang up the damn phone and call him.”

“Call him!” Charlotte interjects before she excitedly gives Jude a high five.

My heart hammers in my chest. It feels like my stomach has fallen to my feet at the prospect of talking to him again.

“I’m nervous,” I confess, my words coming out hurried. “What if he doesn’t want to talk to me?”

Jude lets out a sarcastic laugh. “Oh, he wants to talk to you. Call him. Now.”

I look at both Jude and Charlotte on my screen, a wave of love and appreciation taking over me for both of them. “Okay, I’m going to call him. Thank you both for the little push.”

“Stop stalling,” Charlotte remarks with a raised blonde eyebrow.

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