Page 77 of Perfect Playbook

I can’t be next to Logan like this. I don’t know why I got up, I need to be at the table, but I’m edgy now. My skin is onfire with Logan in here, and I’m determined to keep a wedge between us.

I lean my back against the island and grip the cool marble. Words race from my mouth at a hundred miles an hour. “He’s at my dad’s. I needed time to sort out this cake which, to be honest, I’m not sure I can even get done. I’m stressed as hell right now and have a million and one things on my mind, so if youpuh-leeease, get what you need from the kitchen and find somewhere else to be.”

He stands and comes near again. “Why don’t you let me help?”

“Help?” My energy takes a turn. Or maybe the dam just broke because my voice is husky and the question comes out more like an accusation.

He pauses to read me. There’s a beat of silence long enough to tell me he gets my drift. I’m not the only one who feels the storm coming.

He reiterates his offer, but this time, it’s not so friendly, there’s a sarcasm in his words. “Yeah. Help. As in assistance…”

“I know whathelpmeans, Logan.” I cross my arms.

Festering, confused feelings bubble inside me. Not being at Nino’s school tomorrow. Wanting to have Logan and push him away at the same time. How much I like being around Logan even though I know it’s just killing me softly… I burst at the seams with uncertainty about what kind of mess I’ve gotten myself into.

The words come too easily because anger is the perfect protection. “I don’t want your help. Your help is what got me all stressed out in the first place.”

My statement is so unfair; my heart crinkles as soon as I say it, but I can’t take it back. I have to put my guard back up.

He saunters brazenly toward me, stopping his toes at the tips of mine. “Me? All this ismyfault, is it?” A rough laugh escapes his lips. “Yeah. Go ahead and blame thisallon me. I know you do. Only problem is I don’t know why.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

He steps his feet on either side of mine, anchors his hands on the countertop with his hands aligning along mine. Heat rises between us, and his voice is all gravel.

“You knowexactlywhat it means.” His gaze darkens. “Why are you pushing me away, Shay?”

Oh God.I knew we wouldn’t last forever without talking about the past. It’s not Logan’s style to beat around the bush. He tolerated my barbed comments and took them on the chin. Unfortunately, they did nothing to deter that steely, hungry look in his eyes when our gazes lock, and now, I’m deeper than I ever thought I’d be. Desire has built, and it’s time to knock it down.

Still, I have this cake to do, and the truth is too ugly and complicated for a night like this.

“Let’s just forget it.” My words are testy.

He leans in closer. “Let’s not.”

I grit my teeth. “Now’s not the time.”

“Well, I think it is.”

“Why can’t you just forget it, Logan?” I raise my voice.

He raises his more and comes undone. “Because Ican’tforget it, Shay!”

My breath hitches.

“I tried to let it go and I can’t forget it, all right? It’s time to spell it out because this push-pull shit is done. We hash it out now. I’ve always cared about you…”

“Oh yeah, I’ve seen what heartbreak looks like on you. You wear it like a devil in an Armani suit,” I hiss.

“Oh, do I?” He lowers his face inches from mine, his hotbreath tumbles over my mouth. “It’s a thousand times better than indifference, Shay, which is what you’re giving me now.”

“Indifference?” I almost let myself succumb to the truth he thinks he wants to hear but sure as hell doesn’t. If only he knew how many times I thought about him. How I chastise myself every time I think about who he once was, how I worship the myth of a guy that doesn’t even exist.

I choke up slightly, part in anger, part because allowing that deep, hidden sadness to escape burns my lungs. “Yeah, indifference issomuch worse than watching the love of your life escort a new woman on his arm every night. If you’re waiting for me to approve of the man you’ve become, don’t hold your breath, because I promise, you’ll pass out.”

“Goddamn it, Shay…” He takes off his hat and throws it on a nearby counter. His sexy brown locks fall down over his forehead, drawn in with frustration. Then, he cages me in again, staring at me more seriously than ever. “It was just an act.”

Raw emotion rises from inside us both.

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